green with envy !!!

[viks]

Hi all,

Hope you well.

When i go to my RS i love to stay behind and help out where i can, which is not a lot as i know not a lot.

I love to see all the young girls/boys, staff etc all going about there daily chores and they look so good and very comfortable around these amazing animals.

I am so green with envy as i still have a lot of fear just being around horses not sure why it seems to have happened after i had a fall. I still ride twice a week though and have been out hacking a few times and i love my riding and being around horses so much.

I am sure the more time i spend around them the less fearful i will be.
I love horses so much. Just wondering has anyone every felt the same i'm so glad that not everyone is like me but i would love to look like others do around these huge beasts (ha ha).

Have some wonderfull oppurtunities at my RS to learn loads of new things ie mucking out/feeding/turning out/tack etc and it's amazing.

The question to you all is How do i tell my face to smile and not look soooo afraid?????

P.S im 35 only been riding about 9 weeks.

thanks
viksx

[horseygirl123]

I think it comes with time, I've always felt at ease around horses, but my husband is similar to you, he always worries about the what ifs.
He doesnt like picking taras back feet up or combing her tail 'just incase' she kicks out or moves quick and stands on his foot. He isnt comfortable leading her 'just incase' she bolts off or again stands on him.
I've tried to encourage him to do the things that he is comfortable with, ie brushing her, helping to put her saddle on, he wont touch the bridle 'just incase' !!!!
saying that, today after my hack I asked him to take her bridle off while I went off and did something else, I spied on him from around the corner, and he was there, talking sweet nothings in her ear asking her to open her mouth :D

Just do what you feel comfortable with and nothing more, it takes time but you will get there, you soon be doing all the things you see the others doing ;)

[Virago]

Hi Viks and welcome to NR. Be warned - this is a highly addictive site!!


The question to you all is How do i tell my face to smile and not look soooo afraid?????


It's really interesting that you should word your question like that because the amazing thing is - if you do 'tell your face to smile' and literally force your lips to smile, then it send messages to your brain telling it to 'feel' the smile. Almost instantly you will feel better and your feelings will match the smile. If you haven't ever tried this, it might sound weird, but it does work. (You feel a bit silly at first, forcing the smile, but try it in on the way to the stables or in the loo or anywhere when no one can see you!)

Another good tip is to 'act as if...' and before long you will be like that naturally! So, act as if you are confident around horses - watch the people at the stables whose presence around horses you admire and pretend you are as relaxed and confident as they are... I reckon before you know it you will be feeling a lot more like them! :)

[viks]

Hi Viks and welcome to NR. Be warned - this is a highly addictive site!!



It's really interesting that you should word your question like that because the amazing thing is - if you do 'tell your face to smile' and literally force your lips to smile, then it send messages to your brain telling it to 'feel' the smile. Almost instantly you will feel better and your feelings will match the smile. If you haven't ever tried this, it might sound weird, but it does work. (You feel a bit silly at first, forcing the smile, but try it in on the way to the stables or in the loo or anywhere when no one can see you!)

Another good tip is to 'act as if...' and before long you will be like that naturally! So, act as if you are confident around horses - watch the people at the stables whose presence around horses you admire and pretend you are as relaxed and confident as they are... I reckon before you know it you will be feeling a lot more like them! :)

I am going riding tomorrow with my son and we are going to do this all the way to the school in the car and i will try to keep it up in the stables.

i will let you know thanksxx

[viks]

I think it comes with time, I've always felt at ease around horses, but my husband is similar to you, he always worries about the what ifs.
He doesnt like picking taras back feet up or combing her tail 'just incase' she kicks out or moves quick and stands on his foot. He isnt comfortable leading her 'just incase' she bolts off or again stands on him.
I've tried to encourage him to do the things that he is comfortable with, ie brushing her, helping to put her saddle on, he wont touch the bridle 'just incase' !!!!
saying that, today after my hack I asked him to take her bridle off while I went off and did something else, I spied on him from around the corner, and he was there, talking sweet nothings in her ear asking her to open her mouth :D

Just do what you feel comfortable with and nothing more, it takes time but you will get there, you soon be doing all the things you see the others doing ;)

Your hubby sounds just like me i see danger in everything i suppose that comes with age i remember my mum quoting al the do's and dont's just in case now i seem to do the same thing i will get better i know i wil (please please)

viks

[Mistertron]

I know how you feel! and if you can help a bit at your RS then thats great!. I have just started meeting up with Est from New Rider who is showing me the ropes! its great having someone to learn from where you can do things at your own pace. Check my mentoring thread in the 'Ideas for New Features' part of the forum - there may be someone near you who will let you go and meet their horse. :D

[viks]

Thanks Mistertron i have just posted there

Viksxx

[tiger28]

hi viks-
i can totally relate to what you are talking about! i am 39 and just started riding this january, up until that point i couldnt even feed the horse a carrot (seriously!). now i cant believe i am grooming them, tacking them up (putting the bit in the mouth!)- i never would have dreamed i could do it. but every week it gets a little easier. i realize i will probably always have some fear because i am getting a later start than most, but it does seem to be getting better:)

[Crazy Mare]

Hi Viks and welcome to NR :)

Ooh I know where you're coming from. When I first started riding I was very nervous of horses on the ground. I used to literally jump out of my skin every time a horse even moved :eek:

The good news is the more time you spend around horses the less nervous you get, so it's great that you are helping out at your RS. Doing this really helped me and now I'm not the most confident person on the yard but I'm much better than I was.

Originally Posted by Viarago
Another good tip is to 'act as if...' and before long you will be like that naturally! So, act as if you are confident around horses - watch the people at the stables whose presence around horses you admire and pretend you are as relaxed and confident as they are... I reckon before you know it you will be feeling a lot more like them!

Also if you appear confident your horses are more likely to have confidence in you, which minimises the risk of all those "what ifs" happening.

Good luck,

CM Xx

[Shootingstar]

Ah, I remember the first few times I was at my RS. Trust me, I know from my own experience that your become confidence will rocket as soon as you stop being jelous and start just getting on with it and enjoying yourself :)

[Faerie Rider]

Hey Viks...welcome to NR...I know what you mean about the whole watching all those 'youngsters' who seem so comfortable and at ease and seem to have an inate knowledge of what they are doing ...sometimes you just have to sigh and say oh well I'll get there in the end...I don't have any fear of horses at all despite having had a serious fall..but I hate my lack of knowledge..I'm going to do a 'Horse owners' course in September to help.

I am 37, two boys, riding since last August but had a 4 month break due to fractured spine:D am now only just getting back on board.:D

Plus there's also the other thing of all those trim young things in their jods...I remember when my waist was like that...sigh..life..eh...:rolleyes:

lol
FR

[Trewsers]

I remember thinking when I first returned to riding 3 and a bit years ago - "well, I'm not too keen on being squished so I'll just have to get help tacking a horse up if I ever buy one"!!! Needless to say, 3 and a bit years later and having spent time on a lovely yard learning lots - I do now have my own horse and can tack her up and feel comfortable around her all the time. Apart from like last night when it was windy and she got a bit excited in her box cos Joe was still loose - naughty girl nearly stepped onto my foot!!!
You'll get with it - and I know what you mean about wanting to hang about after your lesson, I used to be just the same!