Time to buy?

[Nimbus65]

First of all, I'm heartbroken. I don't own my own horse and ride at a RS. I'm (ahem) a larger lady so can only ride a few of the horses at our school. I was really suffering with my confidence . . . and then my instructor put me on Rocky. On paper we shouldn't work well together at all. I can be a nervous rider and have really struggled with canter. Rocky is sharp, sensitive and will tank off if riders grab hold. I don't know why, but I trust him. He's forward (sometimes a little too forward but I've learned how to ride through that), honest, and a real schoolmaster. I came second in a dressage competition on him and he's taught me how to ride flying changes and how to canter without stirrups. I can't tell you how much I love that big boy. Thing is, though, he's 19 . . . and he had a tough working life before his current owner bought him and brought him to our yard. He's often stiff, but he will work through that stiffness. Until now. He's been tripping alot . . . on hacks and in the school. Twice now I've ridden him in the school and had to stop because he was downright lame behind (he's usually footy in front). Yesterday he didn't feel right when I warmed him up so my instructor and I headed out into the forest . . . we hadn't gone quarter of a mile when I said we should turn around . . . he just didn't feel right. Very footy and pottery. It might just be a bad case of thrush or a corn (he has been prone to both). Or it might be that he's 19 (going on 20) and is starting to wind down. I have a sneaking suspicion that I may have sat on him for the last time. He's the type of horse who will go downhill fast - the less he does, the worse he'll get. I suspect that his owner will put him on light work - hacking only - once he comes sound and that pretty soon they'll make the tough decision to have him PTS. I came home and cried. This feels awful. It's like losing a boyfriend (if that makes any sense at all). Rocky has been my sanity. I have a stressful job (and dealing w/ the floods was no picnic either) and every time I came away from a lesson on him, I was smiling inside. When Prinnie died, I went into Rocky's box and cried on his neck. What will I do without him? His box is the first place I head when I set foot on the yard. It'll feel terrible to see him on the yard and not be able to ride him (or give him a bath afterwards and generally play with him), but it'll feel a darned sight worse come the day his box is empty - and now I know that day is getting closer.

Sigh.

But it's started me thinking. Rocky is the only horse up there I get anywhere near as much out of. There are other forward-going horses but I'm too big for them. None of the other horses I ride can teach me as much . . . I spend half the lesson just getting them to go forward, which I find hugely frustrating. I've been thinking about buying something for a while, but I'm beginning to think that this is the push I need to bite the bullet and do it. I've run the numbers and it won't cost me any more £££ to buy something than I currently spend riding 2x/week. There are other things we should be spending our money on - and the girls will kill me if I buy myself a horse and don't buy them a pony (and I can't afford both). But this (riding) isn't a whim for me. I'd do it every day if I could and I've been doing it for close to six years now. I'd like to do some local competitions (dressage). I'd like to have something I can hack out on my own. I'd like to have a horse to love and play with as well as ride. And if I buy something, what do I buy? Given my weight (12 stone or so) I need something big, but I'm not crazy about really wide, super-tanker horses. Rocky is part Warmblood and that suits me fine. I love dressage (I used to jump but haven't recently). I also don't know where I should keep it. I could keep it at our yard (on working livery). Or I could find livery somewhere else. But where and how? There's a lovely livery next door to our house but it's too expensive. I have a full-time job, so would need assisted livery. Where do I find such a thing?

Head swimming.

N

[mnmnm]

what about trying a loan/share first? At present many people are getting worried about the credit crunch and other living costs increasing, so it may be a good solution for both of you. This would get you through the first few months and into the routine, to know if you can really commit to the time and money as there's always something you didn't budget for.....

Yes it does seem there are many horses up for sale and that prices are reasonable at present, so maybe there are bargains around -but don't be too ready to jump unless you can be certain you will be able to cover the costs.

You could get a Sec d which if well built would carry your weight without issue, and they can do a good dressage test and jump well, plus they are hardy enough to live out in winter too if needed.

Good luck

[ginageorge]

:)I agree it may be a good idea for you to think of possibly looking for a horse to loan or share to start with and see how you get on.Good luck to you anyway on what you decide.:)

[Hippyhorse]

Would agree with getting a share first,great way to ease yourself into and help you to work out the numbers. Also you'd be suprised at what most horses can carry comfortably, a lot of people worry they need something much bigger than they actually do to carry their weight. This tends to be because at riding schools they have weight limits that tend to be quite abit lower than whatthehorses are actually capable of carrying because 1 the number of hourse they have to work and 2 because of all the different riders they have, a 9 stone beginner will be harder on a horse than a 12 stone intermdiate/good novice) so you may find you don't need as biga horse as you think!

good luck what ever you decide, it's a big step to take, but a very exciting one!

[cazrider]

Not sure how old your daughters are, but my daughters were 10 and 11 when I bought my first horse, and I bought a 15hh 12 year old coloured cob for us all to ride. I weighed about the same as you. It was made clear he was my horse, and he was a bit strong for them really, but very kind and rarely gave them too much grief. We all enjoyed him as a family for the five years I had him. He took them through their early teenage years, and was back to being all mine when they hit the boyfriend phase. This is definitely a consideration. Whatever they say now, they are very likely to outgrow the horse phase, and you probably won't, so I'd say definitely buy a horse for you, not them. Also don't think it has to be something enormous just because you aren't a lightweight. I weigh more than that now, and my current horse (not my first horse, as he tragically had to be put down age 17) is a 15hh section d who carries me easily.

It was also amazing how easily the girls found share ponies to ride on the yard I had Apache on livery.

I'd also certainly recommend you find the livery yard before the horse. Try the internet, yellow pages, tack shops (boards and just by asking the people there) and word of mouth.

I hve a lot of sympathy, Nimbus65, as I bought Apache for pretty much the same reasons you are talking about, and I have to say it was the best thing I ever did. It just needs a lot of preparation and thinking about.

[BlackBess]

Hi Nimbus - ditto the advice about considering a share/part loan first before looking for a horse to buy. There was a horse at the RS I've just quit, who sounds exactly like Rocky. She was very forward going and had a reputation as a bit of a nutter who would evade like mad and completely the wrong sort of horse for me. But, like Rocky, she made me feel safe, she never tanked off with me and she never evaded with me. I seriously considered putting in an offer for her and I miss her like mad but I will never forget her for what she taught me.

I currently have a part loan and that has taught me so much about the commitment that is needed and tbh I won't be ready to consider buying my first horse for at least another year. If they are going to reduce Rocky's workload, and it's obvious from your post that you care deeply for him, it's just an idea, but what about asking his owner if they would consider you part loaning him. Wishing you all the best.

[Midnight Rose]

For starters, I don't think 12 stone is large at all. I weigh over 11 (I'm about 11st 5lbs at the moment) and I ride the ponies at my RS. You're not a novice, so you will be balanced and easy for the horse to carry.

Does your riding school know your weight? Perhaps they think you're heavier than you are. Sorry, this is a bit blunt (I'm famous for it...) but if you're shorter you may look heavier at that weight because you'll be curvier. Weight can be very deceptive. I'm 5' 6" and used to ballet dance very seriously. I pick up muscle easily, I have a biggish frame and I enjoy exercise so I'm muscly. At my skinny skinniness size 8 clothes used to be too big in some shops and I weighed between 8st 10lbs and 9st. I'm a heavy person.

I don't think you should have to ride the very big horses. My OH rides my half shire, huge hairy share horse thing and he's quite a bit heavier than you!

Anyway, after all that I'll get to the point. I think a share/loan would be a good idea because it teaches you all the looking after bits while there are people around to help you out. You would learn all this with a horse of your own if you picked a good yard, so it's up to you.

I agree that your girls should find share horses on the yard you're visiting, nearly everyone is looking for a sharer with a horse/pony so I don't think that will be too difficult for them :)

[molly34]

If your RS thinks you're too big at 12 stone, they're either very, very over-cautious or they need to get some more horses! If you have a quick look through the adults who ride ponies section you'll see some much bigger people than you riding much smaller neds, quite happily.

If you think it may be time to get your own, and you're happy that you have enough knowledge/experience/support to do it, then go for it! If I was in your shoes I'd be sorely tempted to try and buy Rocky too and have him as a retired companion...

[Tasel]

Only consider buying him if you do have the money spare. And if you do, please do bear in mind that we all have to say goodbye to our wonderful animals one day. My horse is only 3, but I myself am sickly paranoid about my dogs, one of which is 6 years old now - and although his breed should last well over the age of 12 (probably 16+), I make him "promise" every day that he is going to be at least 30!!! :eek: Obviously, that's more to calm me down, whilst he looks at me in a confused manner (What? 30?? Last year it was 25 and the year before 20???). :o

I do agree with one of the posters above though: only buy your kids a horse that you can ride, too. Always told myself that's what I would do if I had kids, as they can easily grow out of it all... (meaning I'd have 2 horses just for me... greedy).

[cazrider]

If I was in your shoes I'd be sorely tempted to try and buy Rocky too and have him as a retired companion...
tempted, but I wouldn't advise you do that, especially as you say money is fairly tight. I doubt he's insured, and he's just getting to the expensive stage, vet fees wise.

[clydesdalelover]

I agree with the comment about a welsh d, theres a 16 hh at my yard whose well built but not stocky! When you first mentioned getting a horse i thought that loan/share might be good for a start, as having a horse on diy is just about the same cost as your riding lessons , but assisted livery can be very pricey, and ull have to be carefull chosing the yard as some can be very controlling.....

but have a look around, you'll no when u find the perfect horse... and as for your kids, just tell them gently that mummy can't afford 2 horses and they are always allowed to sit on mummy's!!!

[colettybetty]

12 Stone ? Phah ! You're a lightweight :D, if you're riding fit and balanced,you'll have lots of horses to choose from.
I'd second the advice about looking for a share to start off with, it'll help you transition from RS horses and you'll get to know a little more about the sort of horse you would like, how livery yards work, the good and the bad, and it'll prepare you for the demands on your time and your purse. Plus, it'll probably be cheaper than your riding lessons.
However, if you really fancy getting your own, have a look at local livery yards, many don't advertise, so word of mouth from tack shops, farriers, local riders (stop 'em and ask ) while you are looking for your horse. I personally wouldn't buy a horse based on what your daughters could ride as well, buy for yourself and if he's suitable for them it'll be a bonus.

[KateH]

I'm currently struggling with my weight so have every sympathy with your feeling heavy. However, do remember that in the past (having recently returned to riding after around 25 years away I'm not sure exactly when this changed) all top showjumpers and eventers had to carry a minimum of 11'11". Many riders (generally the women!) had to take their saddles etc. with them to weigh in, but many men simply strolled to the scales, confident that they would make the weight easily. So if all the TB and near-TB competition horses were expected to carry such a weight in their work, surely it wouldn't be excessive for any sound horse with a balanced rider doing mostly flatwork?

I wish you every success in taking the big step to ownership. I'm contemplating it too, once finances have stabilised a bit, and would love a Welsh Sec D, an Irish Draught or any ordinary but kind and forward-going small horse.

Remember also that Fells and Dales ponies routinely carried 16 stones of lead, ok at a walk but all day every day. Fells can be super performers in all disciplines, and if you can cope with their short stature they are charismatic, tough, wonderfully good doers and very good fun.

[Mehitabel]

at 12 stone you don't need a supertanker if you'll be the only one riding it. schools have considerably lower weight limits for their horses than they can actually carry, to allow for the long hours, unbalanced riders, people who lie about their weight, etc etc. for instance we set our weight limits for our ponies at at least a stone below what they could carry as a maximum. they work hard and have a lot of riders, and we want them to last.

any of the large native breeds, for instance, would carry you without blinking, any arab (as long as not a spindly tiny one), TB, etc. a one to one relationship where you're the only one riding is a very different matter.

[Drifted]

I used to be paranoid about my weight and weighed about 12.7lb when I got my first cob 15.2 M/W, he was on part livery with all the mucking out done by myself. Anyway doing that and riding every day I soon dropped a stone and 2 jodphur sizes, 2 years later another stone has melted away:)
I think you'll find that having your own horse to look after you won't be worrying about the weight issue you think you have, too much else to think about.
I also think a loan or part share would be a good idea to start with.

Good luck.

[Joyscarer]

I think you'll find that having your own horse to look after you won't be worrying about the weight issue you think you have, too much else to think about.

Try telling my body and mind that. I've done nothing but gain weight since I bought Joy! :rolleyes: :D