Daphis last farewell!

[jordanross]

My gorgous girl will be coming home on the 29th at 10am. I have all this cofirmed. im finding it so hard. and i just hope non of you guys have to ever experiance this. My life has come crashing down around me!!! and theres nothing i can do that makes it any easier! i am totally devastated and theres no other word to desribe it.

some of you may think this is silly but today i gave away everything i owned for daphi to the rspca. ( i know theyt arent great sometimes) but they try there best.... and sometimes, thats all we can ask for from people.


Ive made a tribute video for youtube which is currently uploading as we speak so i,ll post a link if anybody would like a look. ( next hour or so)

also....I decided i wanted more than just a farewell for the absolute love of my life! the afternoon she returns i have ordered today and paid for 2 horses and a chrome coloured carrage to take us 2.5 miles to the bridle path and land we never got to ride on, where ill scatter her ashes into the wind... and set her free. it,ll just be me.

and once again you guys have been brilliant with me giving me so much advice and spuring me on when i was down and feeling negative about things. so a big thank you once again everyone

Jordan ( and daphi) x

[swaartpaard]

I've been following your threads and would like to say I am so sorry you lots your lovely girl.

Keep all your memories and think of all the wonderful times you had together.
I love you idea of giving her things to horses who need a little extra help.

Best of luck with everything xxx

[greymare]

You have my deepest sympathies.

At least your baby girl will come home to stay.

Jen
x

[Marey]

Hey Jordan, what a terrible time you are going through losing Daphi like that. I've been reading your posts about her and I enjoyed reading your progress and it was clear how much you feel for her. Sorry for your loss.

What you have planned sounds like a lovely way to say goodbye to her.

All the best x

[lottie.dot]

I am once again so sorry for your absolute huge loss. You have been amazing dealing with this, I couldn't hold myself as well as have been able to, which shows your immense strength.

Best of luck for all your future endeavours.

x

[jordanross]

Thanks! i feel so numb i really do. i keep going upto the field it is the strangest feeling knowing she isnt there ... or in her stable.

Ive had that cleared out today by some garden works men. its been scrubbed from top to bottom and everey trace of straw and hay or horse for that matter removed...

i just cant bear it! anything that reminds me... ive had to erase! its the only way i can cope.

Im not gonna lie, ive thought about getting smashed! going out and getting slaughtered! but with the medication i already take it wouldnt be wise... and i dont wanna die just yet! besides.... ive left my wild days behind... even though daphi has gone, she got me into such a good routine and my whole life changed and it was all because of her. and i like my life now. even though i was up and downstairs dressed at 4am with nothing to do... no speedi beat to soak, no carrots to chop.... no stable to muck out ... nothing.

Life feels pretty empty atm, my little baby freddie ( chihuahua) keeps trying to comfort me... hes such a little baby, he doesnt like seeing me this way. but how can i tell him whats goin on.


my partner has left me to it, and gone back to his house in the lakes. if hed stuck around a min longer id have stuck a knife in him! he suffers from asphergious( spelt wrong) ... and has a very insenstive side , i know it isnt his fault, but at times like this i just want to be alone its the best way really.


guys youve been stars you really have, all your kind messages, reading them sets me off....but thank you so much! hey you guys have helped me so much and im really greatful for that!

I think maybe in time, i might ride again although i dont ever want to think about getting another horse! i would never betray the love i had for daphi ever! but i think it would all of been worth something if i carry on riding... so in time i will! I,ll go for riding lessons and become the horseman.... i intended to be with daph.

( video is almost done btw) just a bunch of pictures of daphi and words...

( Ive removed all pictures of her from my pc, i intend to keep the video on youtube.... that is the only way i,ll be able to see them myself from now on too)

[Denbenj]

Well done JR, that was also a nice thing to do donating the goods to needyhorses, wether the RSPCA balls up sometimes or not, I'm sure the horses they have rescued will appreciate the nice things :)

[jordanross]

how do you let go of something so lovely??? when the time comes.... i dont know how i will, but i know i'll have to.


I love you so much daphi FOREVER x

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NngBqkfMhNg

[cinammontoast]

Don't get rid of the pictures. In time, you'll be able to look at them and not cry, honestly. Keep something of her, not just the memories. It hurts, been there, done that, had to get rid of all pictures from my computer, but I'm glad I kept them in a folder so now I can look at him whenever I want and remember the good times.

[sarchie]

I have just bawled my eyes out from start to finish, what an amazing tribute. She was a beauty. xxxx

[happyhacker101]

That's a lovely tribute to Daphi JR, it's always hard to lose something that we love but keep the pics as one day, you'll be able to look back and smile - honest!.

[kestrel]

What a lovely tribute - it's perfect!
You have done her proud & like you say she'll always be in your heart. But ditto the others about the pics.
xx

[nicolawx]

What a lovely tribute, made me want to cry :(

[luvmelol]

What a great tribute to your girl Jordan. She was a very special girl and could not have been more loved. R.I.P Daphi. x

[beating_hooves]

That was a beautiful video JR :)

[BlueWicked]

what a lovely tribute jordan and the idea of the carriage is beautiful...


i have strong beliefs, and im sure that Daphi was sent to you for a reason: because she was in the twilight of her life and deserved a Dad like you to pamper her in her final months... and because you needed her to show you a new way of living, a new way of being Jordan..... that is her legacy to you, hold it dear xx

[Kimmy C]

Hi Jordan, what a lovely send off for Daphi, you really are a lovely, caring person. Just remember that although it will be only you and Daphi on that day, all of us here will be thinking of you so you will not be totally alone. Hope its a beautiful sunny day for you both.

I know what you say about your partner, I have a son who is autistic. With my love and best wishes

Kim xxx

[cloudandmatrix]

So sorry- very touching video- she will have been so glad to have had someone like you in her life. Will be thinking of you...

[HorseBird]

Oh Jordan you've reduced me to tears with that lovely tribute.

It does get easier, I promise you, it just takes a while. Take one day at a time sweetheart xxx

[Lolly-lu]

RIP Daphi :(

[spencer's mam]

R.I.P. Daphi :(

[mikh]

JR didn't know you very well, but it's very sad what's happened :( take care.

[garnet2424]

i have strong beliefs, and im sure that Daphi was sent to you for a reason: because she was in the twilight of her life and deserved a Dad like you to pamper her in her final months... and because you needed her to show you a new way of living, a new way of being Jordan..... that is her legacy to you, hold it dear xx

I thought this too :)

Lovely tribute, she was beautiful!
Remember & cherish those memories & best of luck for the future, Jordan :)
xxx

[alisonq]

Beautiful tribute to a very beautiful girl. I think the same as the others Jordan - she was sent to you for a reason - you needed her to show you a new way of life and she needed you to look after her. Have looked back at all your photos over the last few months as well as the tribute - and I have to say she looks so loved and cherished in all of them - you should be proud.

Thinking of you and sending lots of hugs (((())) and do hope you decide not to waste what Daphi has taught you and give another needy horse some love and care.

Run free at the Bridge Daphi xxxx

[JustJas]

It was a lovely tribute.

Daphi was very lucky to hhave sepnt her last days with such a devoted owner. Take care of your self.

[jsr]

My heart just breaks for you, I'm so very sorry. She was a very lucky girl to have found you. All my thoughts are with you.

[carn77]

I cant watch your tribute as i know it will make me cry...
What a beautiful idea with the horses and carriage truly amazing way to send her off!

I echo Bluewicked she was sent to you for a reason and has helped you learn few things....when your ready daphi will send another horse your way so you can continue with your dream

Take care Jordon lots of love xxx

[devonlass]

What a lovely idea to give Daphi her final send off,am sure she will appreciate it from where ever she is.

Memories can hurt at the time,but you will one day look back on them dearly,and they will bring you joy rather than sorrow.

No one who touches your heart like Daphi did will ever be forgotten,but she would not think badly of you if one day you had another equine friend:)

[lhogg]

Hello. I was really sorry to hear your news on Friday. You're coping with it really well.

Reading this has reminded me of two things. First, a really posh gent of my acquaintance. My background's council housing scheme - his is Eton, country estate and a title. I was at his house once doing volunteer work and his horse had died a month before. Fell going in the horsebox and broke a leg. Even a month later he couldn't tell us without crying. Sometimes people seem so different on the surface but underneath just the same.

Second, when I read your post on Friday I had just been reading about those two poor horses that were rescued earlier this month half starved. In a week or two would you be able to visit the RSPCA place with your social worker? Maybe see some horses that have received the gifts you gave that Daphi didn't need any more? Maybe the first new things some have had for a very long time. Could you help out a little bit there, with horses that are recovering from a bad patch too? Much less intense than having a new friend so soon.

Praying for you.

Louise

[kerenza]

JR, mostly I'm a lurker here, but have come out of hiding to say that I've followed your threads and I'm so very sorry for your loss. It was such a shock to see you had lost Daphi, I think it hit everyone who has been reading your posts. She was a beautiful soul - sending hugs your way, I know what it's like to lose a horse so suddenly:(

[Monika]

Beautiful video of a very special girl. I am sorry for your loss again.

[jordanross]

Im just sat in bed, obviously yesterday was hard i had so much to sort out. this is the worst possible EVER to happen and affect me this way. i dont think i realised just how much she meant to me, and what a big part of my life she had become... Im helplessly upset all of the time.. i know this is normal, but it hurts so much, i dearly loved her, im waking up each morning and i feel so alone and empty i cant possible explain to you guys how terrible it is. i just dont know what im going to do now!

i feel like staying in bed... and never getting up. hiding under the duvet and not coming up again ever! i know ive said this a few times but why is life so unfair? it really is.

Look after your horses guys! love them so much and make sure you cherish every single moment you have with them ok x

[rubysmum]

oh s**t - now im crying too
you are managing this terrible thing so well - my heart goes out to you
love & hugs
cathi, ruby & oliver:)

[dizzydolly]

Sweetie, that is the most beautiful thing in the world and you've just put another on the waterworks count ;) God, I just can't stop crying for you now! Daphi is such an angel and no force on earth could take those precious memories away. And I know this may be hard right now but smile! Daphi was sent to bring you the most incredible joy not sadness. God bless you, my darling, and RIP Daphi <333

[sheryl]

i feel like staying in bed... and never getting up. hiding under the duvet and not coming up again ever!

I felt exactly like that when my first pony died. I'd had him 22 yrs and he was my best friend too. I didn't leave the house for 2 days. It really is hell to feel like this, but you DO get over it, honestly. You'll never forget her, but there will come a time when you can talk about her, and look at her pictures, without getting upset.

Be strong. Daphi wouldn't want you to be sad... Hope you feel better soon xxx

[bexc3]

What a beautiful send off for a beautiful girl. You're in my thoughts Jordan, i know its hard, ive lost a few horses over the years but it will get easier, it does however take time. The pain you are feeling now will ease up gradually as each day passes.

R.I.P Daphi. xxxxx

[kayjayhorses]

I'm sorry I couldn't watch your tribute but I bet its wonderful, your words alone have set me crying so I don't think I could put the photo's to the pain you are feeling!

Don't lose any of your photo's, you are feeling so much hurt right now but soon and I promise you it will happen you'll be able to cope with the upset. I lost my gelding 3 yrs ago so I do know how much hurt you are feeling - its such an undescribable pain but it will lessen - look after yourself and don't push your partner away you need each other and as you realise, life can be very short and you have to make the most of it all!

Take care x