New rider, unhappy lessons

[Zoie]

Hi. . .I'm so glad that I found this site, I've just sarted riding (I'm an adult beginner only been riding for a few weeks)
I think that I've finally found two instructors that I really like and trust, unfortunately I had to go through some really scary situations, the last resulted in a fall, before I found them. All the bad lesson experiences including the recent fall, had the same scenario. . .the horse would just not go, kept evading. . .the instructors kept pushing me to kick harder and keep insisting, the horse was clearly not in the mood for this and I instinctully knew this, I was fustrated/the horse was fustrated. . .finally the horse "spooked/bolted" and I went flying.
I have since found different instructors, whose approach really mirrors the philosophy of this site (which I also, really agree with)
My questions are, if I'm in a situation again where the horse refuses to listen to aids, what should I do? It seems silly to just keep doing the same thing only harder!
Are there other options? and also because I'm such a new rider how to I tell and instructor that I'm not comfortable using such a forceful approach? Last question, I'm still a bit sore from the fall (happend 2days ago) is it a good idea to take another lesson, even if soreness and stiffness is still present? (I think I can handle the discomfort
I've had dance classes that have left me in more pain)
All your insight is so greatly appreciate I really feel lost? Thanks Zoie

[Horselover2]

Zoie, so sorry to hear about your fall, it can be really unnerving! I would suggest that if in a similar situation where the horse refuses to move, first try increasing your aids (more leg but no kicking, and incline your seat slightly more forward) If that doesn't work, try changing directions. Chances are that if you can get the horses head to turn, his body will follow. Hope this help...maybe someone will come around that has more ideas. Good luck to you!

[Vicky]

Hi Zoie

Have you read Heather's book 'Enlightened Equitation'? I've only been riding for a year or so and once I read this book began to question the way I was being taught. I have now found a new instructor and noticed a difference in my riding during my first lesson (which was an assessment of my riding).

Although I do not feel in any way qualified to offer any one advice on riding, I would say that before you next get on a horse, explain your previous experiences to your instructor and make it clear that you do not want to be put on a similar horse. Having had several falls :( and horses bolting off towards main roads :eek: when I was a child and teenager, it has taken me many years (10+) to get back in the saddle. After a year I am finally beginning to gain some confidence, so the last thing you want is to be put on a horse that will knock your confidence at the beginning. If you read Heather's book and then talk to you instructor, you should get some idea of their approach to teaching - if it reflects what you have read then hopefully you will have a great time learning to ride. If not, vote with your feet.

Good luck . . . Vicky :)

PS - I did have one previous instructor who used to question me as I was riding - assess the horse, what is good/bad about it, how does it differ from other horses, how do you think you can help the horse, what exercises should you be doing, and so on. I found this really useful and it gets you thinking why you are doing certain things in certain ways, rather than just responding to your instructors commands - you know why you are doing them. My current instructor also does the same, but I had not come across this previously, so if you get an instructor that questions you, I think its really useful. :D

[Elaine]

I am sorry to hear about you fall. these things happen in all sports. Something happens in the beginning and it sets you back. But its another experience. You have learned from it and you just have to keep going.
Well about the force...thats tough. I have had stuborn horses in the past and I didn't know what to do. It is always ok to tell the instrutor that you don't feel comfortable about something. A instrutor is there for you, and you should ask for guideness. Does a crop bother you? I little tap will remind the horse that they should pay attention. Some horses you don't even need to give them a tap they just know you have it.
I know force sometimes doesn't feel right, but a horse can tell what it can get away with and what it can't so you have to make the call.
I hope all things turn out for the best! Elaine

[olympicprincess]

I agree with the stronger leg aids or crop. It sounds as though you're becoming a passive rider. If you can't talk to your insructor about your problems, get a new one! Part of their job is communication. Even ask your instructor to get on the horse to see how it reacts to them. It should help them to understand the problem- either you have a bratty horse or it's just taking advantage of you. If you have a horrible ride between lessons, call them to discuss it. I don't suggest riding when injured or ill. It especially won't be of any advantage to you- you won't be riding at your best.
Good Luck!

[michal]

I can relate to your story! I did not get thrown...but I took a lesson that lasted over an hour and I could not get him to respond to anything...we walked solid. And when I was paying 25 dollars an hour that is frustrating...because I did not learn a thing...my instructor did get on and had trouble herself. I decided it was time to change schooling horses right off. I agree to explain to the teacher the kind of horse you would like to ride...but it is really helpful to go and watch a lesson taught by several teachers...it is amazing the different styles of teaching out there. I really need a teacher that praises me. And shows me how it is done first & then I get on and try to copy her. I also need someone that does not say too much at a time or I tune them out and miss the point and lose my feel with the horse. I have my own horse & I just started this year too. I am amazed how much I have gained my sense of feel by riding by myself and remembering the teaching in my head without her standing there. I have gained so much confidence in riding because she is not there to bail me out...but this is after several months of lessons...I will start up again soon. Good luck...It is a slow process...your riding a bike second nature will only come with time in the saddle and repition and time spent with the horse you ride to bond with him.

[Rick]

Zoie, This to happened to me at my first ride with my horse. Then at my second. At the advise of a long time horseman and with him at my side I took his advise and stopped being a VERY PASSIVE rider, scared to make the horse upset, and started riding with the attitude that I was NOT a new rider. The differnce in the response from the horse was amazing. At first I was told that he was testing me to see what he could get away with. When he did get away with not walking or moving when asked,and I did not disipline him for it, I had just taught him that he could make the decision not to move. This left me with not knowing what to do.

My friend then gave me a riding bat. Then I asked for movment, if i received nothing I gave him a one time pat on the rump with it. While at the same time giving the movment with my leg cues. Stii if no movment I tapped harder and faster till he moved then I stopped right way. This took a few times till HE decided that he was going to listen.

The main thing is, I showed him by riding passive, that he could get way with it.

Now when ever I am around him and when I ride I ALWAYS act in charge and not timid. This has worked wonders! :D

I have also been told that any horse will aways try and test you forever. This is thier
nature to establish the pecking order.

You could also practice lead line and do lots of stops and starts. With clucking as you start walking. Then cluck with your leg cues to ride the walk.

Again I am not a expert, this is what works for me !

[Zoie]

Thanks everyone for your replies, I'm riding this Thursday and look forward to applying all of your suggestions. I really found the advise about being a passive rider helpful. .
I certainly have a fear of upsetting the horse, and have a beginner rider attitude of uncertainty, so much so I'm afraid of using a crop, but I will definitely gather up some courage for my next ride, use a crop and ride with more conviction.

I have Heather's book and really love it, it is a bit much for me at this time, so I'm taking in small amounts of information at a time. . .does anyone have a suggestion for a book on 'horse behavior,' I think that it would help me a great deal if I could learn more about horses. I'm a real novice, up until a few weeks ago, I had never even touched a horse.

Thanks again for all of your insights. Zoie

[Farm_Girl5]

about the posts about using a crop... ok I have never used a crop ON a horse. I've carried one for sure and used it on me but not on a horse. Like last Friday I rode Free range with a friend and the guy told us if my friend's horse got really slow and not listening find a stick to use as a crop. So her horse was being stubborn and not listening so I got off and found her a GREAT stick (hehehe) and told her to use it on HER leg. Anyways off we go with me in front into a trot and what does she do!? Uses it on the horse... the horse kicks it's hind legs out at it... ok I say to her again to use it on her leg. ok after a few jumps when she doesn't believe me we try again and she does what I say and we go into a nice trot and at one place even into a canter. So using a crop on a horse is not ALWAYS the solution! Try it my way and see if you get the same result. When you DO use it on YOUR OWN leg make sure that the horse knows you have it and it makes a noise.
ok sorry this was so long. Don't you jsut LOVE my stories! :rolleyes:
Cheers!
Kristy

[bren]

Good idea, Kristy. I use mine on the saddle flap in front of my leg, since I wear short boots. Just enough to wake the horse up, right? Since that 2nd ride on Marty that's all I have had to do, he has a healthy respect for crops and whips.
Brenda

[Farm_Girl5]

Brenda, Yes exactly! As long as he's not drifting off and he UNDERSTANDS what your doing but just being stubborn... then a loud noise is sure to wake them up and the horse will respect it!
Glad to see someone understands me! LOL

Kristy

[Kiwismum]

My trainer, discourages the use of crops for anything other than show jumping in a competion. What she does reccommend is that the rider carry a dressage whip at all times, and use it only to reinforce the leg when the horse is not listening. One little tap is usually all it takes.
The advantage of the whip over the crop is that it is longer and so you don't have to move your hands much or let go of the reins in order to give the horse a tap by your leg.

Having a fairly young horse that is still in training, I have done this and it works well, lets the horse know not to ignore your legs.

[Mar]

First of all, congratulations on wanting to stick with it! You have more confidence than you think you do!

This is what I would do -- ask your instructor for lunge lessons. They are invaluable, and in my opinion a good way for a beginning rider to gain confidence, to get used to the FEEL of being on a horse. Then, you can start to apply your aids without having to steer.

It's not uncommon for school horses to become "dead to the leg." And if your horse senses your passivity, he'll think "well, she's giving me leg pressure, she's kicking away, but she really doesn't mean it."

Get some lunge lessons -- MANY MANY lunge lessons. At our barn, you can be on the lunge for months, as long as it takes, before you are "set loose."

Good luck!