Putting your trust in your horse

[Miriam]

Have had Peter for almost a year now and know now that I still have a lack of faith and trust in him :(


I can hack him out on his own, I jump him over smallish jumps but still dont trust him (or is it me), tried bareback riding yesterday and just wanted to get off him. I did not trust him not to take off with me. Did not help with him trying to head for the gate :( Only a head collar and lead rope so next time going to put him in a bridle. Know I was tense and feeling sick the whole time I was on him. Could not relax :(


Lately he has been not standing still to wait (which he used to do) but Iz says its not him its me. She has noticed that I'm putting my leg on him. I don't feel this at all. All I feel is him prancing around, moving around and wanting to walk forward :(


I feel I'm hitting the stage where I don't want to ride anymore :(

[Mehitabel]

are you having lessons? you might need a bit of help to regain the feel and knowing whatyour body does when you tense up, if you aren't feeling yourself putting leg on but people on the ground can see it, you might just need some input on regaining conscious control over yourself. also if someoen is telling you what to do, you might be able to just do it without worrying about trust and what he might do, as your mind will be on the instructor.

you can't force yourself to relax or trust the horse - the conditions need to become right, and then it happens without you choosing to do so. if the conditions aren't right then it can't happen. so don't try to make yourself do it, think of what needs to be in place before you feel it might happen - then work towards that.

[Tootsie4U]

Its still hard for me to trust Bonfire after all these years. But I have noticed without fail that on the days where I just let my expectations go, and let myself trust him, he never lets me down or puts a foot wrong.

In my experiences with him, I've learned that expectations and pre-conceptions really do him injustice - in more ways than just under saddle.

I dont know why I continue to ride him defensively sometimes but its a habit I wish more than anything I would just get over.

[Miriam]

Lessons at the moment are done by Iz when she is up to see Rhi as I cant really afford them at the moment. This is something that has only happened in the last few weeks. I've always felt like I've trusted him before and never felt scared of him before.


It took me years to trust Rhi and when I sold her and bought Peter I took along a friend who has known me from being a very nervous rider. When she said that she would have every confidence in him and me to ride together I trusted her as I know she would never let me ride anything that she thought would be out of my league. I still do know that.

I really want to get to grips with him just don't seem to be able to lift the barrier at the moment. I want to get back to where I was when I first bought him. Happy and contented with him. I'd also like to progress with him.


Thanks for the replies guys. I know I'll stick to my riding him so hopefully it will come back and I can get on with it again

[Mehitabel]

so what has changed i8n the last couple of weeks? did you have a fright, or did he react to something ina way you wouldn't have predicted? anything else goign on in your life that mgiht have carried throug hto riding confidence?

[Lucy J]

i can sympathise. i can be like this with my mare and am always like this with my new forest pony. the pony never really puts a foot wrong, but I backed him and remember him a few years ago bolting round the school with me as he got a fright from the lunge line. now he has never done anything like that since, although at the same time he bolted with me he went through the school fence with someone else....now there is this little gap in our school fence...so i always cut that corner JUST incase.

with my mare i am usually fine, but if we are on a sponsored ride or hacking somewhere new / jumping i don't trust her which makes me and her tense, i close my knees and thighs against her, she is uncomfy and we don't get on. if i just let go and get on with it she is fine. lessons make a big difference i find because you are too busy doing what you are told to have time to worry!

[martini55]

Sorry you are feeling low :( I have to say that for me, it has taken right up until this March until I could trust Martini with all aspects of riding and I have owned her for almost 6 and a half yrs. This summer has been the first in ages that I have truely truely enjoyed having her and been able to do the things I've wanted to do. I found lessons to be fantastic for me and had weekly lessons for a couple of years with a fab instructor. It really helps having someone on the ground talking to me and pointing out to me when I am tensing up/not breathing etc. because I don't notice it on my own. Also giving me 'homework' to do during the week was great as I would go in to a schooling session knowing what I wanted to do which I think makes me ride better and concentrate more. It does sound like he is quite sensitive to aids so maybe you could save up to have a lesson every few weeks?

Is there anywhere you ride him that you feel particularly confident? If there is, maybe stick to that for a while?

[Miriam]

Thats the thing I really can't pin point to anything that he has done wrong except starting this prancing, walking forwards and it did not seem to matter what I did he would not stop and stand still.


I've always had a fear of jumping him something I wanted to get over and when I jumped him at the x-country he has a lovely floating jump.


I've been fairly confident riding him anywhere. Won't stray to far from home yet though. Maybe I know where I want to be but am expecting too much too soon

[martini55]

What does he do when you ask to stop? Does he evade? ... just thinking if he has had his teeth done recently?

[Miriam]

He usually starts to prance to the side and tries to go forward. Did this recently when Iz and I were on a hack. This is when she said "no the wonder he goes, you have your leg on him". I never realised. He is very sensative to aids. Teeth are not due till Decemberish