Pining ......death of his friend

shellonabeach · #1 14th Jun 2002, 11:55 AM

Last night one of the 6 horses owned by the lady who looks after mine when I'm at uni died.

Muffin was about 27 or 28 and was found dead in the field.

The problem is his best pal, Merlin - they did everything together and even shared a stable. She had only had them 18 months, she bought them so that they wouldn't be split up.

Merlin has not eaten all day - he is still out with the other 3 that he is usually out with he has just stood at the gate (of a different field to that the other died in) and called all day.

He has had lots of fuss and my horse tried to groom him. Sue thinks that he is not going to be around long either.

What can we do? He too is 27 or 28.

What can we do to stop him pining away?

Thanks
Shelley

Sarah · #2 14th Jun 2002, 02:28 PM

I'm sorry to hear about Muffin and that Merlin is now so upset.

It may be that Merlin is going to find thigs hard seeing as Muffin and he were so close. I suppose time may be a great healer and hopefully he will find himself a new friend soon. It is good that your horse was trying to integrate him back into the herd without his pair bond by grooming him.

As with people in grief, i understand equine grief can manifest itself in many ways and take time to pass. Luckily Merlin has other horses with him. I don' t think there is anything you can do to instantly cheer him up.

I hope things pick up for him soon.

Sarah

skye · #3 15th Jun 2002, 04:23 PM

i lost my first gelding 4 yrs ago,he had been with 2 others for years.My lad was put to sleep in the field and burried in his favourite spot.The other horses watched from a far field.When we allowed them to return to the field he was burried in they spent ages digging at his grave .
can you let him return to the field muffin died in? so he can see he is gone ,no longer waiting for him.patience,and time will be a healer.There is nothing you can do instantly he needs to grieve for his freind .good luck and hope things get better.

shellonabeach · #4 16th Jun 2002, 12:32 PM

I didn't realise until I took Merlin for a walk the day after Muffin had died that Muffin had been burried in one of the fields. Merlin pulled me straight over to his grave.

I think he knows now that he saw the grave that Muffin has gone - he was all eras pricked pulling me to it but as soon as he saw it the sad expression returned.

We are doing all we can he is doing better than imagined.

Shelley

Sharon H · #5 16th Jun 2002, 12:56 PM

There is a specific Bach flower remedy for grief/separation. Unfortunately I can't remeber which one it is. They aren't that expensive so it might be worth a try?

shellonabeach · #6 17th Jun 2002, 12:21 AM

People keep telling me about these Bach remedies.

Where do I get these from? Is it the saddlers, chemist or vet?

Thanks
Shelley

skye · #7 17th Jun 2002, 03:39 PM

local health shop is the best place to try.
rescue remedy is good for shock ,stress and grieve(use it regually myself)
rock rose is good as well,there is loads of info on it ,the people at the health shop are normally quite good with these,but bear in mind they are used to treat people so might not be succesful on horses.good luck

pamplemousse · #8 17th Jun 2002, 04:00 PM

Hi shellonabeach

Maybe an idea is to go to Boots or Holland and Barrett (much less expensive!) and check out the books that are there with the remedies. They are talking about people in them, but if you know the horse well and observe his behaviour you can apply it to him. The main ones for this situation to read are Star of Bethlehem for shock of separation, Walnut to help adjust to the situation, Sweet Chestnut for hopelessness and despair and Rescue Remedy to buy anyway because its good for horses in nervous or stressful situations and for people too, so its always good to have handy...
Select the ones or one that sounds appropriate for Merlin and give them to him at least 4 times a day on an apple quarter or in his water (this is less helpful because I have never known a horse that drinks a lot). Do this until he improves. Four times a day is a minimum at the beginning more frequent than that is fine.
I hope it helps, try to do it as soon as you can to help him out.

tasha · #9 18th Jun 2002, 08:17 AM

You can also give the remedies straight into the mouth like a wormer. I use rock rose on Kally when she was stressed at PC camp in this way. Just be careful that when they tast it the do lick and chew so take the dropper out of their mouths ASAP or else they might crunch it!

Hope he gets over his grief soon!