Confidence and slight lack of ideas!

Olivia C

Olivia C

New Member
Feb 12, 2017
15
8
3
United Kingdom
Hi,
So a couple of weeks ago I was offered a horse to ride a couple of times a week to bring back into work. He is a 14'2hh heavyweight and chunky cob who is gorgeous. I jumped at the chance and took it because the more riding the merrier! I had a few lessons on him to start because he is a little bit jumpy and nervous, and am now more comfortable with him. I haven't cantered yet as he is a little unfit and I am working on getting my confidence up now I am riding without my instructor there. Confidence is an issue I struggle with, as I am quite pessimistic and always think I wont be able to something and I spend too much time thinking "what if this happens..." and "what if that happens..." just wondered if anyone had any tips to get my confidence up, or anyone shares similar issues? Also wondered if anyone had any ideas of exercises to do for a horse that's a little unfit and a rider that lacks a bit of confidence? can involve poles but not cantering or jumping yet. Any advice would be greatly appreciated!

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Well it's good that you have lessons too - a good instructor can work wonders for confidence issues. There are so many of us on here that have had confidence issues over the years. Hopefully you'll also get some advice on fittening him. Poles are good, there are often lots of helpful exercises in horse mags like Horse & Rider, tho people on here will be able to suggest some things you can practice. I spend too much time thinking on what if's which is why a good teacher can do so much good for this by getting you thinking and working on stuff, which keeps your mind too full and busy to worry!
 
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Welcome to the forum. We have all been there in relation to confidence, myself included.

What some find helpful for confidence is to note down what you are happy with. The "I can do" list. You mention feeling pessimistic so this list will actually say to you I can do xyz.
To build confidence I suggest to people to do something until they don't feel anything anymore. So if riding over a pole did worry you. Stay there and you are bored then move on to another pole.
Feeling anxious and worried is fine, but if the thought of it scares you, it's too much.

There is a schooling seriesI think it's is 101 something. I found that great at the time.
I love polework and you can ride in and out of and not necessarily over.

Are you hacking out?
 
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Trewsers said:
Well it's good that you have lessons too - a good instructor can work wonders for confidence issues. There are so many of us on here that have had confidence issues over the years. Hopefully you'll also get some advice on fittening him. Poles are good, there are often lots of helpful exercises in horse mags like Horse & Rider, tho people on here will be able to suggest some things you can practice. I spend too much time thinking on what if's which is why a good teacher can do so much good for this by getting you thinking and working on stuff, which keeps your mind too full and busy to worry!
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Thankyou! I'm glad to know other people have had the same issues. I am riding him on my own for another couple of weeks then ill be having some lessons to work on the canter. Hopefully as time goes on we will build confidence and trust in each other!
 
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newforest said:
Welcome to the forum. We have all been there in relation to confidence, myself included.

What some find helpful for confidence is to note down what you are happy with. The "I can do" list. You mention feeling pessimistic so this list will actually say to you I can do xyz.
To build confidence I suggest to people to do something until they don't feel anything anymore. So if riding over a pole did worry you. Stay there and you are bored then move on to another pole.
Feeling anxious and worried is fine, but if the thought of it scares you, it's too much.

There is a schooling seriesI think it's is 101 something. I found that great at the time.
I love polework and you can ride in and out of and not necessarily over.

Are you hacking out?
Click to expand...
Thankyou so much! Instead of trying lots of new things I think I will keep each ride pretty similar providing he doesn't get bored, until I gain confidence. Poles are quite good for us to do as he seems to pick up his energy a bit more over poles. I hack out on my friends pony quite often but the horse in question doesn't currently hack because he too spooky only through lack of exposure.
 
It's creating that fine line between building up confidence and getting bored.
If he is on the nervous side then repetition might settle him.
Decide what you want to do before you go in the school. If you just stroll about not knowing where to go, you will begin to focus inwards on your worries as oppose to today is the clover leaf. If that's too hard there are easier ones out there.

http://www.dallyupranch.com/cl_cloverpattern.htm

Mine can be hesitant and finds security in knowing what am doing. She knows patterns.
 
I believe in having a plan for any schooling session, and when you are feeling nervous is especially important to set yourself up for success, select things you will do that are achievable and you are reasonably comfortable with (101 arena exercises is a great book for ideas) and then select 1 thing that you are less comfortable with, but decide before you get on that you will only try that last thing if everything else goes well, no point trying something more difficult if its been an off day and the basics aren't going to plan :) and importantly if you try the harder thing and it doesn't go quite to plan, for both your and your horses sake go back and do something easier before you finish, always finish on a good note and it will set you up to start on a good one next time :)

A great thing if you are feeling a bit nervous is to use markers, cones, poles on the ground to give you something to focus on, practice walking a really straight line (which is actually really difficult) from one cone to the next away from the fence, and work on getting a really nice circle rather than an egg or a square with wibbly lines in between the corners :p you might walk from 1 marker to the next, then trot to the next and walk the 3rd but really focus of getting lovely sharp transitions at the marker :) these things are really excellent foundations that so many of us skip because they don't seem to achieve much but they really do, most of us seem to come back to it later but you can use this opportunity to work on these now while he is building fitness :D
 
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newforest said:
It's creating that fine line between building up confidence and getting bored.
If he is on the nervous side then repetition might settle him.
Decide what you want to do before you go in the school. If you just stroll about not knowing where to go, you will begin to focus inwards on your worries as oppose to today is the clover leaf. If that's too hard there are easier ones out there.

http://www.dallyupranch.com/cl_cloverpattern.htm

Mine can be hesitant and finds security in knowing what am doing. She knows patterns.
Click to expand...
I will try that, thankyou!
 
Can I just say to those who don't know - I know @Olivia C personally and aside from the whole confidence thing, she is a perfectly capable rider. Her only slight issue is she leans forward when she is scared which as we all know, is human nature and she doesn't quite get him going forward enough but that is down to confidence and that will come with time. Other than that, she's very capable. I honestly have no idea where the confidence thing has come from because I see you ride Olivia and think you're really quite good. You have also ridden Toffee when he is so fresh and you were fab. You just need to get your shoulders back and not tip forward and above all, believe in yourself because I cannot stress enough that you are better than you realise.

It takes a brave person to get on a horse that hasn't been ridden in months and do what you do, knowing full well that he is a spooky, scaredy cat and there's a chance of him jumping. You're doing so well and I'm really proud of you so don't give up please, just keep doing what you're doing because we all think you're doing great.

If you are really feeling that unconfident, get some more lessons with Becky because honestly, she is nothing short of amazing and she will get you confident very quickly. She has brought my confidence through the roof. I wasn't hacking at all at the end of last year and now I hack miles on him with other riders and alone, I school him alone and I feel so much more confident in my own capabilities. That's down to her. You know what a sod Toffee can be and how sharp he can be and I am so confident on him right now because of my lessons. It's cost me a lot but it's worth every penny. Honestly, she can help.

newforest said:
There is a schooling seriesI think it's is 101 something.
Click to expand...

I have that book. I'll dig it out for you Olivia, it's great.
 
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I don't see an issue with being a bit nervous to be honest.
As for tilting forwards, I put my hand up to doing that. My internal voice does speak up and say sit up. It could be from being in front of the movement though.

I have 101 dressage exercises as well. But I haven't had a school all winter.
 
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I used to tip forwards too until my pony decided he'd throw his head to the floor one day. Caught me off guard and I fell to his neck. Only problem was, with him being Small pony he doesn't have much neck and I nearly hit the floor. I learned to sit up and get my shoulders back pretty quickly after that lol

I do sometimes sit a little further forward than I should but generally I make sure I'm straight as possible.
 
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I am a nervous rider, always have been and probably always will be! What helps is accepting how I feel and not beating myself up about it. I pick small things to work on and when I have mastered them I feel accomplished.

Transitions between paces and within paces make schooling interesting. Try fast walk, medium walk and slow walk etc. Try 10 strides in each different pace. This will really get him listening and interested in your aids.

Lateral work is quite easy and fun. Try sideways movements on the straightl or spiraling in and out of circles.
 
SeeingSpots said:
Can I just say to those who don't know - I know @Olivia C personally and aside from the whole confidence thing, she is a perfectly capable rider. Her only slight issue is she leans forward when she is scared which as we all know, is human nature and she doesn't quite get him going forward enough but that is down to confidence and that will come with time. Other than that, she's very capable. I honestly have no idea where the confidence thing has come from because I see you ride Olivia and think you're really quite good. You have also ridden Toffee when he is so fresh and you were fab. You just need to get your shoulders back and not tip forward and above all, believe in yourself because I cannot stress enough that you are better than you realise.

It takes a brave person to get on a horse that hasn't been ridden in months and do what you do, knowing full well that he is a spooky, scaredy cat and there's a chance of him jumping. You're doing so well and I'm really proud of you so don't give up please, just keep doing what you're doing because we all think you're doing great.

If you are really feeling that unconfident, get some more lessons with Becky because honestly, she is nothing short of amazing and she will get you confident very quickly. She has brought my confidence through the roof. I wasn't hacking at all at the end of last year and now I hack miles on him with other riders and alone, I school him alone and I feel so much more confident in my own capabilities. That's down to her. You know what a sod Toffee can be and how sharp he can be and I am so confident on him right now because of my lessons. It's cost me a lot but it's worth every penny. Honestly, she can help.



I have that book. I'll dig it out for you Olivia, it's great.
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Thankyou @SeeingSpots hes a great pony - I just need to belive in myself more. ive gained a lot of confidence after this week, im going to stick at it for a month or so and then ask Becky for some lessons for the canter.
 
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