Ina.click where are you? And how is your riding going?

Hello

Well I had a quite not good experience but not with the horse, with his owner. After calculating and calculating I reached the conclusion I cannot afford a horse yet: loan for the horse + rent of the horse + my own rent + trainer + vet +car loan..too much.

But I wanted to keep paying for lessons. When I told this to the RI he got angry, saying stuff like he put his hopes on me and I am letting him down anyways.
I think he was 100% sure I will buy his horse and made some plans on that, although I never said "yes I will" but more like "Yes I'll try"

I got so upset myself as well that I did not come back to riding lessons. Now the bad part is thats the closest riding center and I ...eh. I'd like to ride again but I dont want to meet that grumpy guy again.
 
d'oh, poor you. I had a similar thing happen. I just had a little break then went back (but my situation was easier as the RI/owner never knew I was upset) so when I went back I just pretended everything was fine and I just try to have different RIs now. I'm not sure what to suggest in your situation. Good luck, I hope you figure something out soon. :D
 
Oh that is terrible, Ina, Hope everything gets better. Try going back, and just act like nothing happened, and see how it goes, if he hasn't gotten over it yet, then well I guess what can you say?
 
I would come back actually, but I remember he is the kind of grumpy guy who wont stop preaching you for hours and I honestly hate that. And this time I did nothing wrong.

I said I will think about it and calculate and see if I can buy A HORSE generally, not his horse or your horse ..i will try and see if I can afford to sustain for 20 years a horse.


Well i cant. I cant afford it yet. And he took it quite personally saying stuff like "people who really want ti would do enourmous sacrifices for that but I guess you're not one of those" Wth am i supposed to sell one of my lungs to buy your horse, pops?!

Anyways as much as I love that horse I am not sure if i want to come back as I took it quite personally as well. Exactly because I consider a great responsability having a horse I postponed buying one and being treated like this is not gaining me as a customer:(

For other training centers I have done a check they are so damn far :( I live in the capital city and they are not allowed to have them in urban areas i think so closest would be almost 2h away. Which kind of sucks.

I dont know what to do honestly. Maybe after we finish the car loan i will actually buy a horse but that will be in few years. Anyways I am not going back there and the worse part is that i left my equipment in his locker :S
 
Hmm. well yes, I don't blame you really. Are there any days that other people are in charge, and he is away, so you can go back and get you equipment? could be a thought. It is not really the best way to gain you as a customer, or any of your friends, just don't understand why people do that to their businesses.
 
Ina,

He is playing a nasty psychological "game" with you, the aim of which is to make your feel bad - turn the tables on him by playing one back, work out how much you COULD afford to pay out of your budget for the horse and then go to him and say " I have worked out that if I REALLY minimise ALL my outgoings then I can afford to pay you £x a month for the horse, deal?"
 
Well he does not want me to rent the horse.

He wanted me to pay 50% of the horse's price.
Total price is 5000euro - thats about 6000$
My share would have to be 2500
For those money I would have half of the horse somehow. Meaning I would not have had to pay lessons for 1 year or so - supposingly after that date I would not need lessons anymore - and pay half of the rent food etc for the horse.

That is still an awesome deal. The horse is young and nice and he is a good trainer although grumpy. But even as good as it is, I cannot afford this deal at the moment.

So whatever psychological games he may have attempted, my reaction was to step out of the whole thing.
 
I agree with cwb I think he was playing a psychological game with you. You did the wise thing of stepping out. If you can't afford it you can't afford it, and believe me there are plenty on here who can't afford to own a horse.
 
ina.click said:
I would come back actually, but I remember he is the kind of grumpy guy who wont stop preaching you for hours and I honestly hate that. And this time I did nothing wrong.

I said I will think about it and calculate and see if I can buy A HORSE generally, not his horse or your horse ..i will try and see if I can afford to sustain for 20 years a horse.


Well i cant. I cant afford it yet. And he took it quite personally saying stuff like "people who really want ti would do enourmous sacrifices for that but I guess you're not one of those" Wth am i supposed to sell one of my lungs to buy your horse, pops?!

Anyways as much as I love that horse I am not sure if i want to come back as I took it quite personally as well. Exactly because I consider a great responsability having a horse I postponed buying one and being treated like this is not gaining me as a customer:(

For other training centers I have done a check they are so damn far :( I live in the capital city and they are not allowed to have them in urban areas i think so closest would be almost 2h away. Which kind of sucks.

I dont know what to do honestly. Maybe after we finish the car loan i will actually buy a horse but that will be in few years. Anyways I am not going back there and the worse part is that i left my equipment in his locker :S
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What a horrible thing for him to say he should be commending you at thinking of every aspect of horse care and taking ownership seriously. I think if more owners thought like you do then there would be less horses at sales or in poor health. How hard for you to only have that one centre close enough to you. Perhaps he got caught up in your excitement for a horse rather than really listening to you. He may have spent time researching for you and felt a little miffed in the thought you changed your mind. Costing has to come into it because I'll be damned if I would have a sick horse that I couldn't properly vet due to lack of funds. His attitude is not indicative of most horsey people but perhaps a little too passionate to say the least. After all you are paying him for the riding lessons not to lecture you on when or not you should purchase your horse. Hope you have some luck finding new instructor. I have now gone through three instructors to now have found the perfect fit for me. Instructors are like good horses hard to find but when you do they will be your teacher for life. As I told my instructor I would hunt her down should she stop lol
 
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