Brandys Second week at the training yard....Bittersweet Moment.

Vicki100

Vicki100

Well-Known Member
Jun 12, 2009
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West Mids
He has been doing really well. Hacking out on the roads...walking/trotting in the school....the trainers are very impressed with him and said he has not put a single hoof wrong.

I went up this morning to watch them exercise him with the view of me riding him. I was really trying to keep calm, but im naturally a very nervous person so of course it was like mission impossible really.

Watched him being tacked up, he was very good, still a teeny bit tense but nothing in compared to the broncking/galloping off I am used too. :giggle:

Rider then rode him round the yard and walk/trotted him in the school. I was really impressed, he seemed relaxed and like he'd being doing it all his life. He was just so chilled even when a tractor came past, he was even offering an outline at some points.



Then it was my turn....gulp....rode him round the yard and he felt great. He was like a proper kick along cob, not sensitive to the leg at all.



Next we went into the school for a walk/trot around....pretty quickly he felt worried, it must of been because I was quite frankly sh*tting myself. He is so different to what im used to (13h ponies!) and the thought of being on a un-predictable horse who could bolt off any moment really unsettled me. I have a really bad habit of thinking the worse and letting my mind wonder off.

We did some walk/trot he was really quite spooky with me, leaping into trot with his ar$e going underneath him and head in the air. :frown:

Some sort of relaxed pics...




Looking not so relaxed lol...


Then it went a bit tits up, he was trotting and he got spooky about something rushed off, took us under a tree and then panicked more. Cue Brandy cantering around the school, with what felt like no breaks or steering. :cold:

To be honest, he was just being a youngster....Finn used to be like it when I broke him in...3/4 years ago it wouldn't of even bothered me....but I really panicked this time....I thought I was literally going to die....I did the worst thing and clutched onto the reins pulling at his face and did a death grip with my legs.

He then aimed straight at the areana fencing...tried turning him away but no luck....he got the fence....slammed his breaks on....and then span the other way.....by some Miracle I stayed on and managed to stop him by doing the one rein stop.

I could hardly bloomin breath after and was shaking like a leaf....why do I have to be such a nervous idiot :furious: I made OH come and lead us round a few times in walk then I just had to get off....was supposed to take him for a hack round the village but just didn't feel up to it. :(

I haven't felt that petrified in a LONG time. I honestly thought I was going head first into that fence and that would be it...broken neck and dead. :cry:

Its not his fault, he didn't do anything wrong...its just him being green...which I knew he would be.

I really just feel like ive had enough of youngsters now, I am not the confident young teen I used to be and quite frankly enjoy the safe ride of my 2 lovely ponies.
Its not like its a new feeling either, ive been feeling this way for a while now. I really don't want the hassle and hard work that they take plus I just haven't got the guts anymore.

But I just feel awful....Brandy is fabulous, and could be such a brilliant horse. He isn't nasty what so ever....but he needs a confident person to bring him on now.

And that is not me.

So a very bitter sweet day. Sweet because I saw what Brandy is truly capable of, and what a lovely gentle boy he is.
Bitter because I know deep down I cannot be the person to bring him on. If I could click my fingers and not be nervous I would, but I cant.

All I know is I feel like the biggest let down ever. I thought it was capable of it, I may of been a few years ago, but now I just lack so much confidence with him I just cannot do it anymore. I have let the horse down, ive let my OH down, ive let the trainers down and ive let myself down. I feel pretty heart broken right now :cry:

Sorry this wasn't meant to be such a self pitying thread. I just don't really know what we are going to do.

As much as it breaks my heart I do think we should sell him as a lightly backed green horse ready to bring on, he just isn't suitable for my OH who does know the basics but isn't very well balanced etc he could do with an older horse who has been there done it etc.

But its not that easy, as OH loves him and brandy is his baby at the end of the day :(
 
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I am sorry to read this. I am glad you are OK that sounds pretty nasty.

Brandy does look good and I am sure that you will not have any problems selling him on and then getting a older horse for you OH to enjoy.
 
Oh dear - I don't think you should beat yourself up about this; you've obviously done the right thing for him by sending him off for retraining. I'm sure, given time and the right instructor, you could overcome your nerves, but, speaking from experience, I'd say it's not a quick process. Is the plan for you or your OH to ride him? Maybe OH is more confident, even if he doesn't ride as well as you? Today was bound to be scary, your first time riding him after so long, and with people watching and all ...
 
Poor you.

I am thinking you are frightened because of your past experiences with him which is perfectly understandable.

Sounds like, unfortunately he is just not turning out to be the horse for you and he isn't gong to be suitable for your husband either any time soon.

What a shame, but we never know with youngsters how things are gong to turn out so I think its always a bit of a chance for any of us.

You have done the right thing with him and tried, sometimes things just don't work out, don't blame yourself, you are a good little rider, it could happen to any one.

He will find a good home with someone who can bond with him.

Try not to make yourself miserable, you do not deserve to be. Just enjoy the other ponies you have and try and move on.
 
For a start it's really nice to hear how well he has been getting on there. Sounds like he's been very honest and willing and the trainers have been making good use of that. I'm glad you have had a chance to see his potential, I know you and your OH care about him a lot and it must make you really proud.

I'm sorry your ride wasn't a great experience :( But there were things going against you as LindaAd and Tina have said - past experiences, being watched, riding him in an unfamiliar place, I'd also bet that his size had something to do with it as you're used to being much closer to the ground. As you said, Brandy's difficult behaviour came when he picked up on your nerves... obviously you can't force yourself to be confident, and you can't force him to have confidence in you, but there is no reason why that couldn't change in time, when he's matured mentally and has had more work and you have had a chance to get used to him. Bear in mind that although he has made good progress at the training yard, he is still so very very green. After a year of work with the right rider he could turn out to be just right for your OH. Have you considered finding a sharer for him or putting him out on loan?
 
OwnedbyChanter said:
I am sorry to read this. I am glad you are OK that sounds pretty nasty.

Brandy does look good and I am sure that you will not have any problems selling him on and then getting a older horse for you OH to enjoy.
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Thanks OBC, I am fine I just feel gutted/guilty about the whole thing. :frown

OH has agreed that we should sell him, im already dreading it but I think it could be best for everyone. :frown:
 
LindaAd said:
Oh dear - I don't think you should beat yourself up about this; you've obviously done the right thing for him by sending him off for retraining. I'm sure, given time and the right instructor, you could overcome your nerves, but, speaking from experience, I'd say it's not a quick process. Is the plan for you or your OH to ride him? Maybe OH is more confident, even if he doesn't ride as well as you? Today was bound to be scary, your first time riding him after so long, and with people watching and all ...
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Thanks for replying Linda :smile:

I know with lots of time & money he could be great with us. But I haven't got lots of time or money to throw into him....god that sounds horrid doesn't it?? but its just how it is. OH just wants something to plod around the lanes every now and again when he feels like it. I just cant ever see Brandy being able to fufill the role any time soon.

The plan when buying him as a 5 yr old was the above, but he hasn't been a straight forward youngster and its taken us 18months already to get to this point, both of us already have dented confidence from him which makes it 10x harder really.

Even at home I don't think id feel any better, we don't have a manage or any safe areas to ride him, just open fields sectioned by eleccy fencing....ive seen him jump it when panicked before, I would hate for me or OH to be on his back whilst he does that. :(
 
Tina2011 said:
Poor you.

I am thinking you are frightened because of your past experiences with him which is perfectly understandable.

Sounds like, unfortunately he is just not turning out to be the horse for you and he isn't gong to be suitable for your husband either any time soon.

What a shame, but we never know with youngsters how things are gong to turn out so I think its always a bit of a chance for any of us.

You have done the right thing with him and tried, sometimes things just don't work out, don't blame yourself, you are a good little rider, it could happen to any one.

He will find a good home with someone who can bond with him.

Try not to make yourself miserable, you do not deserve to be. Just enjoy the other ponies you have and try and move on.
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Thanks for replying Tina :smile:

Its so so hard when you've had negative things happen with that horse, I did really try going today with an open mind, trying to forget the past, but I just couldn't. :cry:

Your right, youngsters are such a gamble....you win some you loose some.

Thanks for the good rider comment, I really felt like the sh*test rider in the world after today but I suppose under the circumstances most people would of been the same.

This situation is making me rather miserable, it was a sigh of relief when I sent him to the trainers which just left me with the three ponies who have no issues. Although I still think I will need to sell Buddy at some point, but he is so straight forward and easy in comparision to Brandy.

OH has told me to write an advert over the next few days, I don't even know what im going to write. Its going to be so hard. :cry:

will stop rambling now, thanks again for your reply, you always seem to understand how im feeling xx
 
joosie said:
For a start it's really nice to hear how well he has been getting on there. Sounds like he's been very honest and willing and the trainers have been making good use of that. I'm glad you have had a chance to see his potential, I know you and your OH care about him a lot and it must make you really proud.

I'm sorry your ride wasn't a great experience :( But there were things going against you as LindaAd and Tina have said - past experiences, being watched, riding him in an unfamiliar place, I'd also bet that his size had something to do with it as you're used to being much closer to the ground. As you said, Brandy's difficult behaviour came when he picked up on your nerves... obviously you can't force yourself to be confident, and you can't force him to have confidence in you, but there is no reason why that couldn't change in time, when he's matured mentally and has had more work and you have had a chance to get used to him. Bear in mind that although he has made good progress at the training yard, he is still so very very green. After a year of work with the right rider he could turn out to be just right for your OH. Have you considered finding a sharer for him or putting him out on loan?
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He is a very honest willing boy Joosie, that's what makes it hard. He doesn't have a bad bone in his body and is very genuine.

I knew the ride wouldn't be perfect, he is as green as grass so I knew that deep down. As I said he did nothing wrong for the amount of experience he has had ridden, its normal but it just sent my confidence plummeting. :frown:

The more work thing is where I struggle....I just cant see myself being confident enough to get on him in our open field...the thought of it makes me feel ill to be honest. :frown:

Sharer is a no go, I have fought long and hard to finally have a quiet field to myself with no-one else to content with, sounds selfish but I don't want random people coming in my field messing around with my things....im not a spoilt brat honest...its just my piece of heaven that I don't want ruined if you know what I mean?? :tongue:

Loan is a possible idea, Although OH isn't keen on it because it would be too heart breaking if he kept coming back and forth etc.

How about I send him to france in a big old jiffy bag?? yes yes?? :tongue:

In all seriousness thank you for replying, it helps me ALOT to hear all these ideas/opinions :smile:
 
Sorry to read that things haven't gone so well when you rode him. He does sound the sensitive sort that takes his confidence from his rider, handler.

If you did sell him, would the place he is at know of anyone or could they sell on your behalf? I am just thinking that they have the facilities, possible contacts and can keep him ticking over.
 
So sorry :( but I think your making the right decision selling him on and looking for an older experienced steady horse for your OH.

I agree with NF bout selling from where he is now if you can
 
It's a shame but at the end of the day if the confidence is really that knocked then the best thing is probably to sell, there will be a competent teenager with bags of confidence somewhere that would likely snap him up.

It's supposed to be fun and if you're too frightened to have fun then there is little point in keeping him.

I agree with NF too would the trainers be able to sell him for yu from there? They'd likely have some contacts to spread the word.
 
Yes, could the trainers do a sale livery for you?

It would save you the trauma and they have the facilities to show him off to his best advantage.

I am sure he will make a good horse for some one and this will have a happy ending all round.
 
Thanks for replying ladies :happy:

Unfortunately the yard doesn't do sales livery, purely because they are a professional racing yard who don't often train/back normal riding horses like Brandy, they do it occasionally for good friends or if they have a spare stable at the time.

They have a waiting list of young TB's waiting to come on the yard to be backed so asking them to keep Brandy for any longer would be unfair...although I would of loved it if they could of sold him on for me...how much easier would of that been!! :tongue:

The rider took Brandy up the gallops this morning, it was lovely to watch he enjoyed himself SO much. It was windy and raining but he didn't put a hoof out of line and loved every second. With a confident rider who knows what they are doing he is a bloomin great horse.

I decided to bring him back home this afternoon as i really think the trainers have done what i asked. He was pleased to be back out in the field with his mates :happy:

Going to let him have a few nice days with his friends and then his sale advert will be going up, not looking forward to it at all...its hard to say good bye. :(

I will also be selling Buddy at some point, no more youngsters for me. I am perfectly happy with Finn & Buffy for now.
 
I wondered if this would have had an impact about what to do with Buddy, I remember the thread about the time factor and him not really having a job.

I miss our gallops, its something I would have used by now, I had lots of fun up those.
 
Awww hun, I really feel for you as I know this must be such a tough decision for you!

You will have thought this through and through, so I'm sure you haven't come to this point over night. You have done him very well working with his issues and knowing when it would be beneficial to send him to the trainers.

I'm sure you will take the time to find him the perfect home and he will be just fine. Maybe just see how you go with Buddy, there's no reason he couldn't be a little superstar for you.

Chin up hun!
 
I am sure Brandy will find a great home.

Don't do anything hasty with Buddy. Sell Brandy first and get that out of your system, you might feel different in a month or so.

I think Buddy will be a different kettle of fish altogether, see how it goes. I am sure you will not have trouble finding either of them good homes, they are nice horses (especially Buddy:inlove: ).

Sometimes I get totally mixed up having three, I feel like I am being pulled in all directions and it would be so much easier just to have one.....or two....:unsure::giggle::rolleyes:

I will have a bad day....or week and say to my husband, 'that's it! I am selling so and so' blaa blaa etc. He (the husband) is very calm and will sit and talk to me and break things down (life is very black and white with him), so we end up keeping the three:frown:

What ever you decide, it will be ok:smile:
 
How are? It must be nice to have them all back but I also now that this will be an equally tough time for you.

You have your two fab horses with Finn and Buffy that cover all your horses needs. passing on Buddy and Brandy to other homes will free up your time to spend it doing what you love with the other two with out the guilty.

Don't feel down about it they have had a lovely time with you and your herd and it will have made them nice well rounded ponies just right for someone else that can give them individual time that youngsters need.

Then you can start the lovely search for a nice plod hack for your OH so you can finally enjoy riding together.

Youngster do consume vast amounts of time I feel guilty that Ginger needs a lot of hours work a week to be the horse he can be but Chanter also needs lots of hours to keep him moving and health. I stupidly thought I was wonder women and could fit in keeping two horses fit and healthy, one comp fit and compete or go out every weekend as well as work full time and see my OH. Oh how wrong was I.

Thinking of you
 
I have nothing useful to add - just kind thoughts. It must be hard to decide what to do and how to go about it all - it's never straight forward is it?
 
Thanks ladies for the support :smile:

I am just really feeling very confused about what to do or what I want to do right now...I think I need a week or so just to let the dust settle and make a decision. :unsure:

Last night OH said he just wanted to keep Brandy as a big pet, which I said was fine as we do need 4 horses to keep the grass down and as companions for when I take the ridden ponies out so It wouldn't really be an issue if it were to go that route. Brandy is a very low maintenance chilled out boy who does make an ideal companion, never causes fights and just eats lol!

but then today OH was saying sell him as he could do so much more etc....

Just seems like we cannot make our minds up...I hope it comes clear soon as this is really annoying me....we make a decision then the next day we change ours minds!! :cold:

As for Buddy it gets even harder as I really have a bond with him, and just love how easy going he is. He is the type who is literally bothered by nothing and I just adore him for that. He is the only one out of my herd who comes galloping up to me when I arrive and just wants loads of fuss/cuddles.
But is that a valid enough reason to keep him?? Maybe I don't know...

We will see...im sure all will turn out for the best....just trying not to over think it all right now. :frown:
 
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