difficult question

Snowyboy

Snowyboy

Active Member
Jun 6, 2007
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Sunny South Wales
:redface:

I know this sounds bigheaded and pushy parent syndrome etc but I am not happy with the group our PC have her ride in - just read the ride times for tomorrow

Elsewere:

She is in the top junior group at one of her Riding Club's and in L3 at riding school, where you have the beginners, then L1, 2 etc She is almost ready to go up another level but she needs to just work on a couple of very little things as they are REALLY strict before they let you go up a level! She's only been having lessons for 18 months so she's done well to get to where she is

she knows her canter leads, diagnonals, can jump 2'9 single fence at home, 2'3 with 2'6 jump offs in competition (and I mean jump not hang on for dear life), leg yield, can jump 1'6 bareback, can w/t/c bareback, can gallop and pull up safely, can do group canters, she has a wall of Best Rider rosettes and cards from showing, she has lots of 7's and 8's in dressage for rider effectiveness

So WHY is she STILL with the lead reins and just off lead reins :banghead: There are kids in the next group that can't sit canter, don't know their diagonals and hang on for dear life over a 1'6 jump - but they are in the higher group to her

She doesn't want to go - can't think why! She said its boring and she doesn't learn anything - and I can't argue with her as its true :frown:

The rally will consist of riding around, no canter, a few 1'3 jumps at the end and lots of just trotting around and changing the rein with her as lead file and all the others crashing around after her with little or no control


So - how do I respectfully ask that they LOOK at her riding and move her up - just to show I am not going mad -



this was her in August - jumps were around 2'3 as it was the jump off - I really don't think this kid is lead rein any more - I really don't - so how do I get them to actually watch her ride - they just say, oh well done - they never actually watch her due the beginners crashing all over the place - I don't want to sound rude but I really don't understand why she is still in lead rein???




and some of you will have picked up she gets him to change leg in canter twice - I really really really don't think she is lead rein and just off (not even first ridden - these are just off lead rein kids - they couldn't do a first ridden class as they can't canter yet)
 
I think your daughter is a brilliant little rider and would speak to the RS about the situation highlighting your concerns and stating that your daughter feels ready to move up and that she feels her riding is being restricted by remaining with lead rein riders.
 
its not RS - they are fine!

Its our pony club - and I REALLY don't want to be coming across as a pushy parent but I really really don't think she's in the right group either!!!

its how you say - err my daughter is too good for this group- without sounding like a big headed pushy parent!
 
Could you tell them that she is feeling bored and not wanting so go & therefore wonder if somebody could assess her riding to see if she could move to a more challenging group? I totally agree she doesn't belong in a just off lead rein group.
 
Are they possibly keeping her back due to age? Sorry I don't know how old she is. Are the kids in the other class older? I wonder if it could be that. Can't see any other reason.

She certainly doesn't sound or look like she needs just off lead rein classes to me!

I don't think you'll come across as pushy. I remember being very upset as a kid as a load of kids were put up into the next class when I had 3 lessons off as we went on holiday, I too was bored with the lessons and it was beyond me then. My mum did say something about it and I was moved up. It was purely an oversight apparently as I wasn't around at the time. Also, you're not pushing your daughter beyond her capabilities, THAT's pushy. You're purely speaking up her as she says she's bored with that class and you both know she is beyond that. Blimey with what she does at home, no way is she just off lead rein material!
 
I feel so embaressed tbh!

I guess it has to be to do with her age as I can't see any other reason for it

They are LOVELY at PC and I really don't want to be upsetting anyone - also don't want to be seen to be one of those "oh my daughter is soooooooooooooooo much better than all you" either

life for me would be SO much easier if I didn't care about what others think and upsetting others - but I am like that so I worry all the time - not one of my best attriubutes but that's just me :cry:

I wonder if I see how she goes tomorrow and at the end of the session suggest that she has outgrown the group and maybe she could try the next one at the next rally? Just to see how she gets on? Does that sound OK? And unconfrontational?????
 
Pony Clubs are a law unto themselves!! The one my daughter went to was divided according to rider age and horse size so they would end up with people out competing at pony FEI in 'lower' groups than those who had just moved up to horses.

More relevant to you however, there was a big divide between juniors and seniors even down to having different camps. The juniors (8 or under) included several children out competing at county level workers etc....this may be the problem you are encountering, particularly if it is smallish branch with not a wide variety of juniors
 
Who would you rather risk upsetting, the PC people or your daughter?

I'd have a quiet word with the person who organises classes tomorrow & say that your daughter is so bored with her current group that she's saying she doesn't want to come anymore & that you can understand why she's saying this. Ask if they can move her up at least one class for the next lesson, if they say no then ask why & make sure you get an answer.

If they won't move her up is there really any point in her going? I'd be inclined to let her decide whether or not she keeps going, if she decides not to then I wouldn't blame her.
 
Snowyboy said:
I feel so embaressed tbh!

I guess it has to be to do with her age as I can't see any other reason for it

They are LOVELY at PC and I really don't want to be upsetting anyone - also don't want to be seen to be one of those "oh my daughter is soooooooooooooooo much better than all you" either

life for me would be SO much easier if I didn't care about what others think and upsetting others - but I am like that so I worry all the time - not one of my best attriubutes but that's just me :cry:

I wonder if I see how she goes tomorrow and at the end of the session suggest that she has outgrown the group and maybe she could try the next one at the next rally? Just to see how she gets on? Does that sound OK? And unconfrontational?????
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I think you'll find it is a age thing. The PC my daughter wanted to join definitely did groups on age.

This worked to our detriment the other way to your problem lol. My daughter (11 now) was 9 at the time but due to learning difficulties and memory probs I didn't want her off lead rein really but they said that due to her being 9, nearly 10 the groups she would be in with would mainly be off lead rein doing w,t,c. They did say she could join the younger group but might feel out of place due to being older.

So, I would just have a word, ask how they decide the groups and if it is a age thing. If it is ask if they can make a acception as your daughter competes etc a lot at a higher level then the rest in her group. Or ask if they can incorporate different teaching for your child within her same group
 
From my experience, it will be age. We were ALWAYS divided into groups according to age. I was in with kids who could barely trot right through to those doing affiliated BSJA but we were together because we fit the age bracket. That's the reason i stopped going to rallies. I was very underwhelmed and not progressing, whereas my sis was too stretched (firecracker pony who liked a flat out gallop at jumps, and instructor refused to lower jumps for her). didn't stick with pony club long!
 
I don't think it would be at all pushy if you asked how the groups are organised - what are the criteria? As others have said, it sounds as if it may be age based - in which case you can then ask how they manage the varying abilities within an age group, and so get onto your concerns.

If it's not age based, I think you need to ask how they assess ability and what the aims are within a particular group.

However, if the bottom line is that your daughter is not getting the enjoyment you and she expect, is it worth carrying on? It sounds as if she is getting most, if not all, of what she needs elsewhere. Maybe leave PC for a few years, and go back to it when she's older and likely to be in a more demanding group.
 
LOL Eml

she's in the 2 & 2'3 team - seriously!!!!!! Gotta laugh haven't you :bounce:

You'd think the penny would drop somewhere


Must be an age thing!

Silly really - at RC we differentiate on ability - much more sensible!
 
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