Encouraging after a fall

C

CER1389

Guest
Hi.
A school friend of mine decided to take up horse riding about 4months back. She'd heard me go on and on about all my horse riding and got jealous as its something shes wanted to try. With my help I booked her in for a lesson and she loved it. Shes continued for half an hour each week for about 4 months without a problem. She picked up rising trot and was just learning to canter.

She had her first fall last week, lost balance picking up canter, exited by the side door, cut her hand on the fence and managed to get a black eye (sort of punched herself as she fell) nothing too serious, but scary all the same. Her parents took her to A&E to make sure her wrist wasn't broken, which I think scared her more tbh.

She now seems nervous getting back on board, shes going to have to wait a while until her cuts heal and the swelling goes down, which will make it worse. Her parents have never wanted her to horse ride anyway, and whilst my friend isn't riding they continue to talk about how dangerous horses are (even though they have no horsey experience) which is making my friend more nervous.

The other issue is my friend is quite tall and well built, so is always riding 16hh+ which cannot help.

I'm contemplating putting her on the icelandics I'm schooling, just sticking her in the lunge arena on the lunge, and giving her a bit of a lesson so she can find her own balance. I'm hoping by riding something smaller she may feel more confident. But I'm concerned because although the icelandics do lunge and school, they are not brilliant and I don't know how they would cope with a beginner; also if she feels comfortable on something small it may make her want to stick to riding small which just isn't an option as all she can ride at the riding stables is larger. As well as this, the icelandics are not mine so I'm not sure if the yard owner would allow me a friend up, after all I'm there to work.

Any ideas on how to encourage her back to the riding stables, get her confidence in trot and canter, AND to stop her parents scaring her hell out of her?!?

I know horse riding is dangerous (I'm pretty well known up at A&E after 7years of horse riding!) But i know my friend loves it, however anything I say to her she dismisses with a 'How would you know?' [ahem, one broken arm, a ripped gum, dislocated things and god only knows what else!].

Sorry this is long, but any ideas would be HUGELY appreicated
 
All you can do continue to talk to her about how much enjoyment you are getting from riding, funny stories about your falls and how you got back on, etc., the return to riding has to come from her.

I don't think it would be a good idea to put her on the icelandic ponies, especially if they are not used to beginners and don't belong to you. The smaller horses at my RS aren't any easier to ride than the 17hh, quite often they are naughtier and more opinionated.

The worst thing would be for your friend to decide to give it another try and get hurt - she'll never ride again, she'll blame you and your friendship could be permanently ruined.
 
Suggest she looks at the celebs on only fools on horses getting back on after each fall ;)

I'd explain to her, politely, that part of the risks of riding, si that if you put yourself on a moving equine, you can expect that sometimes you find yourself NOT on a moving equine quicker than you'd like. It's part and parcel of learning to ride and if you can't accept that risk then you should not ride in the first place. It sounds harsh, but it's really quite true.

I think perhaps it's worth her weighing up whether she enjoys horse riding enough to accept the risks that come with it.
 
Can she book in for some lunge lessons on a riding school horse instead of your iclandics? It really helped my balance,and its great for giving you confidence in the gaits,without worrying about controlling the horse as well.Loads of advance riders have them regularly,so that they can concentrate on themselves.
 
I went through this with a friend recently as well...

Don't push her...encourage her...talk about how much fun you're having with your horses!
Talk lots of positive things, how they make you feel, how beautiful they, how free you feel when you ride, etc...
Coax her out to the stables to groom...then perhaps ask her if it's ok if you ride while she's there.
After you've ridden, ask her if she'd like to just sit on your horse for a minute, and then maybe walk her around...
Then see if she would like to go on a lunge for a bit....or if she would like to ride around for a little bit by herself.

Oh, and if you doubt your icelandics being calm for a beginner, maybe see if you can borrow a lesson horse??

My friend went for it all...it only took us 2 weeks after her fall for her to be loving them again! :D She's out loving horses and riding again!

Good luck with your friend! Best wishes!
 
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