How often is too often to be asked to look after a friends ponies.

W

WelshRider

New Member
May 9, 2017
4
2
3
44
Hi,
How often is too often to be asked to look after a friend's ponies.
My friend has two cobs. Recently I have been asked quite a lot as a favour to look after them when she goes away.
2 weeks in the lead up to Christmas and over Christmas
1 at the end of February
2 weeks in April
And I have been asked to do 2 weeks over summer and I have a feeling that I will be asked again over October holidays.
The ponies are out in a field. So poo picking, feeding, filling up water and general check up.
I live 5 mins by car. But I have my own 3 ponies to look after and I work too. I guess I am just a bit worried that this is becoming a regular thing.
 
I too was going to ask, how often does she look after yours?

If "Never," then you should say "I could, but could you do mine from x to y."

My field mate pays a friend £20 a day to do what you do, and that is a friend of hers!
 
  • Like
Reactions: HaloHoney
I do similar stints for a friend, She looks to my animals if I am away. Makes no difference to me, Does not take me long. I generally have hens, pet rabbit, ducks and horses to look after, 5-6 times a year
 
  • Like
Reactions: Trewsers
She does mine but no poo picking one week a year.
It was a reciprocal agreement in the beginning. We both do each others as and when. But I only go to visit family up north once a year. I guess I just didnt realise how often she would be away.
 
If you're starting to resent it then it's time to have a talk about it with her before it sours the friendship. Decide what you'll be happy with beforehand - maybe you'd like to have some weekends off even if you don't go away or it would take away a lot of the work if you left the poo picking & she did it when she came back? If you don't want to do them at all then be honest with her & say that, though if it was me & I'd already agreed to the summer cover then I'd still do that.
 
  • Like
Reactions: HaloHoney
My friend was pushing her luck with me a bit, she has 2 out and 1 in at night plus 5 dogs, she was wanting me to do the 2 out and dogs every other weekend it seemed, plus do all 3 for single nights and a week to three weeks at a time when she went on holiday and whilst I don't mind occasionally it had got to the point she would organise time away and not tell me (there was no asking any more) until after she'd left as she assumed I would be OK to do it.

I really don't mind helping but last time she was away for a week she left nothing ready and being January and as she doesn't have power/lights at her yard I was racing to muck out and fill nets etc after work and it meant my fields didn't get poo picked for the week and my neddies got no attention, which is totally unreasonable to expect too often.

In the end I just said no occasionally so she didn't always rely on me and if I do the horse thats in I insist that the stable is left ready so all I have to do is pop him in.
 
I will continue to do the times when I have said I will do. Maybe I am a bit too soft. For example, I have family coming over from Canada in summer to stay with us. I am taking some time off work but not all of it. Then I get asked to look after her ponies during this time. And although I tell her that I have family coming over she still expects me (not in a nasty way) to care for her ponies. And I guess to be honest, this is my holiday time too, and I just want to have a bit of me time rather than caring for her ponies too. It wouldn't take me long to do them. Half an hour a day I guess. But it just feels like I am too convenient. I know she doesn't have anyone else to care for them, but before I moved here, I used to pay for someone to look after mine when I lived elsewhere. She is a good friend and I feel it is a delicate situation. But I can see me ending up looking after someone elses ponies for 2 months or more every year, when I thought it would be a couple of weeks.
 
I think it's nice if you can help each other out, we do this at my yard. But it can't be all one way. Could you say you can check on them, make sure they have water but can't poo pick as you won't have time? Would make it quicker and easier for you.
When I go away mine will be left out friends will check they're ok have water and that's it. I wouldn't want or expect them to poo pick.
 
Lissie said:
I think it's nice if you can help each other out, we do this at my yard. But it can't be all one way. Could you say you can check on them, make sure they have water but can't poo pick as you won't have time? Would make it quicker and easier for you.
When I go away mine will be left out friends will check they're ok have water and that's it. I wouldn't want or expect them to poo pick.
Click to expand...

This was exactly what I was going to suggest, and since you've got family staying I think you should be very insistent on it. If yard rules insist on daily poo picking then tell her she needs to sort out someone to do it. To put it bluntly if she knew you had family staying & yet assumed you'd still be ok to do hers then she's tacking the mick.

If it helps I have a couple of friends who pay me to do their horses when they're away. I will feed, hay, water, check over & muck out if they're in but I don't do poo picking.
 
Thanks for the replies. I will suggest that I can only check water and feed but no poo picking. That will make things easier for me. And if I am being asked repeatedly I may say no occasionally if I am very busy with other things. I have no problem caring for them for holidaya. But if I end up looking after them for 2 or 3 months a year then for me I feel that is too much.
 
  • Like
Reactions: carthorse and Jessey
It's definitely too much if you're being treated as a free livery service for two or three months a year. A friend of mine looks after my dogs while I am away but I always buy her a posh meal out and reward her with wine and chocs (she wouldn't let me pay her) and it's only for a few days here and there.
 
newrider.com
Top Bottom
Back