I'm giving up

nat17

nat17

Minnie, Sam and Dolly
May 30, 2002
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Cotswolds
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:cry:


After a second bad riding experience in 1 week I have decided its time to give up.

I can't continue to have the mounting issues I am having, its damages my confidence, and I can't continue to have confidence issues it ruins the whole horse keeping experience, this is an expensive and time consuming way of life to get very little, if any enjoyment out of it.

So, I am giving up. I am selling Sam and Dolly and keeping my retired mare Minnie until her time comes.

At least its the right time to sell horses:yellowcarded:
 
Sorry to hear this, glad you are keeping your retired horse though, always sad to see them being sold on. Hope you find great homes for your two
 
so sorry to read this, glad you have decided to keep Minnie.

I assume you have looked into having help regarding the mounting issue? (sorry i am not aware of you having an issue with it so dont know the history!)
 
My first thinking would be an instructor so you have support or groundwork. Lunging, long reining, leading out, time just being together and not riding for now until you find outside help?
 
Oh gosh, that's a bit of a shock. Why don't you turn them away for a few weeks and take some time out before you make any rash decisions. I know after my accident I was ready to sell them all and give up and friends told me not to act impulsively and to take some time to think. I'm SO glad I did as I'm really loving it all again now.....

Hugs that things have got so bad for you xxxx
 
This is a sad post but are you absolutely sure sometimes giving yourself a wee break from riding allows your brain to re-boot itself.
 
really sorry to hear this, I had to sell up for different reasons, but it has given a good break without having to stress. I do regret selling though, and wish Id found a way of being able to just turn away untill I was in a better position. My was a youngster though so slightly different situation. What about selling the both and finding something that matches your needs better? or as others have said just taking time out by turning away. I agree though horses can be a very expensive stress, and if its causing your mental well being so much upset then you know whats best for you x
 
Sorry to hear this - will Sam and Dolly not miss Minnie?
You might feel better if you have a break from it all? Could you get an instructor on a more often basis? Do you have any horsey friends nearby? Sorry for all the questions! Lots of good thoughts to you. Txx
 
I'm really sorry to read this Nat. I think I know how bad it can be to have a mounting issue that seems impossible to fix. Confidence problems aswell, and its the worst bit of riding to have an issue with.
I respect that you've probably tried everything, you're quite a resourceful lady and I know you had a RA out at some point recently. I just want to go into solution mode for you and try to stop you from selling, but thats maybe not right for everyone.

My interest was piqued by your other thread - what does he exactly do at the mounting block, and what made you aware that you overtighten the girth? Just interested to better understand.
 
Flipo's Mum said:
I respect that you've probably tried everything, you're quite a resourceful lady and I know you had a RA out at some point recently. I just want to go into solution mode for you and try to stop you from selling, but thats maybe not right for everyone.
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Same here. I wish I could take over for you for a bit to give you some time to recouperate. I am so sorry. Don't rush anything.
But I am sure whatever decision you make will be for the best and well thoughtout.
 
I need to change my girth for the longer because the cob looks round at my foot. People think I am mad but she does gives me signs before she gets to the biting stage.
So if yours moves off or away when you mount, perhaps its just a case of a different girth?

Or teaching them to line up and don't get on, just fuss and brush from above. I do that sometimes because she loves it. Especially with the rubber massage curry.

Perhaps selling one/loaning one/turning away one-would give you more time or the other?
 
I am not ignoring questions about the issue, just not ready to go into the detail in my own head to explain it. There are so many variables that could be the issue, I need to work through them regardless of sale.

I have my RA coming out tomorrow. I have her help when ever I want it.

I think this is growing into a bigger issue for me, when you think of it, how stupid to be jumping on a flight animal anyway. Can I expect him to be happy if I never leave the riding paddock ever again? I do not ride every day, and I do bring him out to train clicker training for mounting as well.. like I say there are many variables to what it could be, I just don't know if I care anymore.

I have had on and off confidence issues for 10 years now, I think enough is enough and maybe I should just give up trying to get it back :frown: I am not sure its worth it anymore :balanced:
 
Okay. If it's not fun then why do it, right? You don't have to torture yourself.
Heck if it wasn't so expensive just keeping them for pleasure and never riding again would be fine.
No need to beat yourself up over it. Be kind to yourself. :)
 
NOOOO! I hope that didn't come across like that!
What I was trying to say is: don't blame yourself for any of this. Whatever decision you make will be okay.
It's okay to NOT work on the problem for awhile. It's okay to do nothing or do only things you enjoy. Don't be mean to yourself. This is a rough time. Treat yourself as well as you treat your horses. Be kind to yourself.
 
Nat if someone is fishing for compliments or sympathy all the time, I go out of my way to avoid answering. I can't bullsh!t. You're not doing that so don't apologise, you feel the way you feel and I think we're a good bunch of folk to talk to about this. We get the whole confidence thing and will hopefully offer sound sound advice as well as the sympathy!

I'm really sorry you're not feeling better. I think its really hard when you've got other stuff in your life. Its like dieting. If you could entirely focus on the problem with no other distractions, life events, etc. then wouldn't it make the world of a difference to how we get on.
 
KarinUS said:
NOOOO! I hope that didn't come across like that!
What I was trying to say is: don't blame yourself for any of this. Whatever decision you make will be okay.
It's okay to NOT work on the problem for awhile. It's okay to do nothing or do only things you enjoy. Don't be mean to yourself. This is a rough time. Treat yourself as well as you treat your horses. Be kind to yourself.
Click to expand...

No it didnt, I just re read my child like stroopy post and thought god is that really me being all stupid and moaning like a silly cow:giggle:
 
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