moving work dilemmas - thoughts please...

sophie33

Well-Known Member
Aug 8, 2004
1,635
387
83
52
London
This is one of those meandering posts - I am abusing NR by trying to get you to help clarify my own thoughts!
So... for some years now I have shared a lovely mare who lives a very convenient two miles from my house and a mile and a half from my work. I am friends with her owner and attached to my mare. Now - unfortunately - my work is moving over ten miles away. Given London traffic I think it is going to take me an hour or so to get to work in the morning and back at night so it is going to cut into my stables time. Some changes are going to have to be made. At the moment I do two stable duties before work two mornings a week but I've already warned my mare's owner that will probably become difficult. I work long hours and really value my horse time to 'get away from it all' but I also value sleeping!
I will still be able to do evenings (I don't have her a weekend day) but will obviously sometimes arrive pretty late. My other problem is that I currently have a lesson once a week or so which I ram into my lunch break. I really, really need the lessons and both me and my share are finally making progress as a result of them. However, my RI won't do evenings so they will become impractical once we move.
As far as I can see my options are:
1) Continue sharing my current mare and just accept that I manage without lessons on her (I could book lessons at a riding school once a month or so to help me).
2) Have two shares! My RI also teaches further out of London and close to where I'm going to be working. If I could find a share at one of those stables (even for one lunchtime a week) I could have lessons there and continue with my current mare. My problem with this is it is going to end up more expensive and - possibly - more stressful than I can manage! After all it is unlikely I'll find a share where I can literally just turn up and ride so some work is likely to be involved.
3) Stop sharing my current mare and look for a new share. This fills me with horror because I feel a strong obligation both to her owner and to my mare. I've been there since the beginning and - while I am no great shakes in the riding department - I know I am valuable to them both financially and in the tlc stakes. On the other side it might be more practical - given the hours I work - to have something near where I work.

I don't have to make my mind up on any of this immediately, but if anyone has any helpful thoughts please let me know.
 
Could you ask your current shares owner if you could do one weekend day? That way you could still have a lesson on your share and maybe one weekday would be more easy for you to manage?
 
I think I'd try and hold fire before making any decisions, you may find the traffic isn't so bad at the times you travel if you work long hours. Looking for another RI that will do evenings might be another option.
 
  • Like
Reactions: lauren123
Thanks both. They are useful ideas. I couldn’t have a whole weekend day but I’m sure her other sharer wouldn’t mind me having the odd weekend lesson. Another Ri is also an option - I love my current one but something has to give...
 
The pony I ride occasionally when Jess is out of action, his owner never objects to him doing 2 sessions (with different sharers) on a weekend day, so might be worth talking to your owner to see how they feel :)
 
I’ve had to end a few shares due to changes in location or circumstances and, while saying goodbye is sad, I have gone on each time to find a new share that has brought me new opportunities and experiences. There are lots of wonderful horses out there, and equally your lovely share horse will find another sharer to love and look after her. If you are thinking of moving on, then in practical terms the start of summer is often the least disruptive time.

Keeping your current share sounds doable with some juggling, but with an increase in stress for you and less enjoyment. I guess it depends how determined you are to stick with this horse versus the potential appeal of starting afresh with an arrangement that fits your current circumstances better.

Good luck with whatever you decide!
 
My first thought was to get another job. I wouldn't want to be travelling for an hour in each direction for work each morning and evening, especially if you already work long hours. Can you do some hours from home instead? Life is too short to sell your soul to the office, the work/life balance is really important and if your work are expecting you to make the move with them, this is an ideal opportunity to negotiate.
 
An hour to drive 10 miles, that would kill me. You can find instructors who teach at all hours so I would look at changing and doing an evening lesson perhaps with the odd weekend one or using a days holiday.

I'd still probably try and do stable duties in the morning as you won't want to muck out in the evenings, how early will you be leaving for work?
 
Thanks all and sorry I haven't replied for so long I've been mulling it over. We are moving offices over the course of July so I'm going to see how long the commute actually takes before taking any firm decisions. Maybe I'm worrying too much and it won't take that long. Meanwhile I think looking for evening instructor is a good idea. I'm also going to keep an eye out for any suitable shares near my new workplace.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Feawen and selside
newrider.com