Not sure what to do with Buddy....

Vicki100

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Jun 12, 2009
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I have been umming and ahhhing for a couple of months now...not really sure what to do with him....

He has just turned 3, and still very babyish both physically & mentally....

He just loves human attention, and will stand begging at the gate to come in and play every day. I always feel awful when i push him aside and get one of the others in to ride/lunge etc

I bring him in once or twice a week to brush and do some in hand work with him, but i just get the nagging feeling that he really could benefit with daily handling and someone spending quality time with him.

I thought i was doing the right thing by just allowing him to be a baby and grow up, but he is so keen and eager to learn and do things i just feel bad for him not getting much attention really. :frown:

But at the same time he just isnt ready for ridden work IMO, his frame is still un-developed/weak and he is still very babyish in the way his mind works.

I suppose i do just lack the time for another youngster, which i feel awful about because i really should of thought about this before i brought him. With Finn/Buffy in 'full time' work and then OH's cob youngster who also needs some time spent with to get him over his issues...i just find myself short of time for him really :(

OH thinks i should sell him, but he would say that as they have never really bonded....so i need some un-biast opinions please NR peeps!!

So do i....

(A) Sell him this year as un-ruined blank canvas.
(B) Wait till next year, get him broken & going nicely under saddle then sell him as a green youngster needing more schooling/life experiences.
(C) See how he turns out next year, and keep him for myself.

The nicest option would be C...but realisticly i dont think ill have a job for him. I already 2 ridden ponies who both cover most ridden activites.

BUT if he ended up being a confident jumper like Buffy, then he could eventually replace her when she retires (She is approx 15 atm...but showing no signs of wanting to slow down!) but that all depends on how confident he ends up under saddle, he isnt at all phased by coloured poles or wings (He loves doing them in hand).

B...would be another good option...but what if i dont have the time next year to spend on him?? I really want him to have a good ridden start in life, which would mean devoting some real quality time to him for a few months.

Option A....I have no idea how much to sell him for?? I know the market is pretty dire for youngsters right now...and i could not bare the thought of someone rushing him into ridden work and re-selling.

I dont even know if i could bare parting with him, he is such a lovely lovely pony. But at the same time he could be so much more, i can imagine him being the perfect pony club alrounder in a few years time.

He has just turned 3, is currently standing at 14.1h. His markings and colourings are beautiful, so he could even do well in low level showing.

He is just so so friendly, easy to catch and handle. Is a star with vets/farriers...not sure on teeth but will find that out soon :giggle:
He is good on the roads and not at all phased by traffic. Has worn all tack with no problems, and had me on board walking around without batting an eyelid.
Also loads no problem and is fully passported/vaccinated.

Bless him, i really feel guilty about this, but i just want him to have the best life with people who really adore him.
Dont get me wrong he isnt unhappy now, he is a very happy little chap, always full of life. So maybe im just being silly putting human emotions in him...??

So help me...what would you do??

Some pics of the lovely fella...

Last month...



Last summer


In his winter woolies lol!

 
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OwnedbyChanter

With out my boys life would be bland
Apr 16, 2009
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That's a hard one Vicki.

There are a few factors one for me would be that the actual backing is the easy part it is the bringing on and dealing with any issue that come up from that that takes the time so for me selling as a blank canvas is the better option.

Also a lot people that want horses that young want to back and bring on themselves so they know how it has been done and it done correctly (by this I do not mean that you would not do it correctly at all more that you see the cowboys on U Tube 'back' horses as professional then selling on as freshly back but green)

Having a youngster myself and one other ridden horse I know how hard it is to keep them both fit and competing while still teaching Ginger.

I think it is very good of you to admit that you can't offer the time needed to do the little one justice and I hope you can make a decision.
 

juliecwuk

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Mar 2, 2006
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If I'm honest I think I would choose A. But take your time to find the right home.

I think if you are struggling for time currently then realistically your not going to have time next year to bring him on properly..,

I'm not too keen on C option as realistically its a big unknown...he may not become the jumper you would want to replace buffy...
 

Tina2011

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Mar 23, 2012
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Oh dear, he is just too gorgeous.....I would have to keep.

Especially as you are un decided. Hang on to him and just try to do as much low key stuff with him as possible. i.e grooming, a little walk out etc.

Tbh that's all I am doing with my three year old this year, she is not very mature but loves attention.
 

squidsin

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Feb 16, 2013
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He's totally gorgeous. Can't offer advice as I have no clue which of those options is best!
 

popularfurball

Learning all the time
Jul 18, 2005
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If he is as babyish as you describe, I suspect if you do alot with him, intensley, then he will be a pony who needs turning away to process it all and do some growing up after being broken.

If you look at it objectivley from his perpective then I suspect you cn make the decision.

Would you feel better doing the initial backing, or nothing at all or all of it?

Would he really feel "wasted" with you? I suspect he is happy out munching with mates! Rascal loves fuss and grooming and nice stuff, and loves his kiddy lead rein stuf - but doesnt mind not working as long as he gets groomed and time out in hand.
 

TBminx

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Mar 22, 2013
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I would try to keep him as thats me but i think the best option if you think no time for him would be a good home or do you know someone who hasnt a horse and would like to work with him at your yard?
 

Jane&Ziggy

Jane&Sid these days!
Apr 30, 2010
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He sounds like such a lovely boy. I would find it very hard to part with him, I'm sure, but tbh I think it sounds to me as though you might be best off with option A, even though youngsters are a dime a dozen at the moment.

And forgive me if this sounds harsh - his markings and colouring are beautiful as you say, but I think for pony showing, even at local level, his head lacks refinement - it has more of a cob look to it. Though if his temperament and behaviour are top notch that could more than make up for it!
 

bitsnpieces

Active Member
Aug 22, 2007
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Vicki, I completely empathise with where you are coming from, having recently been there myself.

He sounds very much like he is at the stage that Bella was, the only difference was that Bella came in every night and as she was only getting very basic handling, she started to become boisterous. This is what really highlighted to me that I was unable to give her the level of attention that she needed.

She also used to stand begging at the gate and was just desperate for attention all the time, but also wasn't physically or mentally ready for backing. I also had plans that she would make a fantastic allrounder for me once Puz fully retires. But realistically, if I didn't have the time to put in, she wouldn't have turned into that fantastic allrounder.

I am also planning a wedding and OH and I are thinking of starting a family in the not too distant future, so I had to concede that I couldn't provide her with what she needed right now. I can honestly say it was the hardest decision to make and I cried so many tears.

However I rehomed her through a scheme that does a lot of screening to ensure that the applicants are genuine, she has been in her new home a week, has been groomed to within an inch of her little life and I've had lots of photos and email updates.

So although it was so hard, I would still make the same decision again.

I guess you just have to seriously think about what it is that he needs, and whether you think you are able to give that to him.

If you want to know more about the scheme I used for Bella, feel free to PM me.
 

Vicki100

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Jun 12, 2009
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That's a hard one Vicki.

There are a few factors one for me would be that the actual backing is the easy part it is the bringing on and dealing with any issue that come up from that that takes the time so for me selling as a blank canvas is the better option.

Also a lot people that want horses that young want to back and bring on themselves so they know how it has been done and it done correctly (by this I do not mean that you would not do it correctly at all more that you see the cowboys on U Tube 'back' horses as professional then selling on as freshly back but green)

Having a youngster myself and one other ridden horse I know how hard it is to keep them both fit and competing while still teaching Ginger.

I think it is very good of you to admit that you can't offer the time needed to do the little one justice and I hope you can make a decision.

Thanks for your reply OBC :smile:

I agree that some people are shocking at backing horses, some of the youtube videos are just horrendous! a:)

But this is also what i want to avoid if that makes sense?? I dont personally think he is even ready to be ridden 'properly' this year, but there is no way in ensuring that if i sell him??

A friend of my YO's was selling a little 14h cob a few weeks ago, and she was only 3 but being sold at as a ridden horse...i felt so so sorry for the mare because she still looked like a such a baby, really bum high etc...and i just wanted to give her a year in the field to mature so much, but 5 horses would of just been silly lol!! but i would really hate to see Buddy in that same situation :cold:

Yeah it is hard work, but at the same time i do love having lots of different 'projects'....i have real issues in making up my mind...can you tell lol!!?!?

But yes thanks again for replying, all these honest answers are really helping!!

If I'm honest I think I would choose A. But take your time to find the right home.

I think if you are struggling for time currently then realistically your not going to have time next year to bring him on properly..,

I'm not too keen on C option as realistically its a big unknown...he may not become the jumper you would want to replace buffy...

Thanks for the reply Julie! Yep it would have to be a real good home, he is just a wonderful pony, i really would never want him to be ruined :(

I agree with option C, it is very optimistic....possibly just me thinking of any way to justify keeping him....??:frown:

Oh dear, he is just too gorgeous.....I would have to keep.

Especially as you are un decided. Hang on to him and just try to do as much low key stuff with him as possible. i.e grooming, a little walk out etc.

Tbh that's all I am doing with my three year old this year, she is not very mature but loves attention.

Ahhh Tina yes this is what i wanted everyone to say LOL! :tongue:

I am VERY un-decided, it will take me a good while to figure this out i reckon.

I have definatly got time for once/twice a week things with him, he went on a little walk today in his roller & side reins :angel:

Just out of curosity what are you going to do with your 3yr old?
x
 

Gimp

Gimpy Gimp Gimp
Jan 19, 2005
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I would take him for little walks out inhand or even longreining to show him a bit more of the world and give him something else to digest if you feel hes eager to use his brain a bit more. Just repeating the usual things of manners you expect from picking up feet and general handling over this summer. He has stunning colourings. I would be worried about someone wanting him backed and ridden away unless I knew he was going to a word of mouth type home. I would say to keep him ( easy for me to say though isnt it!) and get a feel for his attitude for the next chapter of his life teachings! Alternatively you can post him to me :mstickle:
 

Vicki100

Well-Known Member
Jun 12, 2009
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He's totally gorgeous. Can't offer advice as I have no clue which of those options is best!

Thanks Squidsin, i am biast but i think he is gorgeous too! :giggle: I brought him just because of his looks to be honest!! :angel:

If he is as babyish as you describe, I suspect if you do alot with him, intensley, then he will be a pony who needs turning away to process it all and do some growing up after being broken.

If you look at it objectivley from his perpective then I suspect you cn make the decision.

Would you feel better doing the initial backing, or nothing at all or all of it?

Would he really feel "wasted" with you? I suspect he is happy out munching with mates! Rascal loves fuss and grooming and nice stuff, and loves his kiddy lead rein stuf - but doesnt mind not working as long as he gets groomed and time out in hand.

Thanks for the reply PFB :smile:

I think he is very babyish and would really just like to see him bulk out etc i think 'properly' backing him this year would totally blow his mind...and even possibly ruin him?

Ideally he could do with lots of walking in hand hacks, some in hand shows, the odd sit on ride, lots of love & attention then being turned away in the winter.

I guess from his perspective he is very happy, he gets to live in a nice field 24/7 playing with his mates he gets a nice feed bucket every night and always gets a fuss from me or OH...

Which is where it gets really hard i guess? He is happy doing what hes doing....he doesnt want for more...does he??

He really suits our little herd well, i love seeing the 3 boys gallop around bucking all the while, he just loves to play wether the others like it or not lol!! :tongue:

As for the backing...the 'inital' sit on and walk round has been done by me....and teaching him to long rein/go on the roads etc He hadnt had anything done with his old owners, they were quite nervous types and seemed to pass it onto him...when i viewed him he was rather on edge/nervy but within a couple of weeks with us he turned into a very confident little man!

I would feel ALOT better doing the whole backing myself rather than thinking someone else is going to do a bad job.

I think maybe 1/2 sessions a week over a year & half maybe i could get him going quite nicely....I suppose i was comparing him to Finn who was an extreme case of nervousness so i did really have to spend hours on him everyday for a good while.


I would try to keep him as thats me but i think the best option if you think no time for him would be a good home or do you know someone who hasnt a horse and would like to work with him at your yard?

Thanks for reply TBminx, i think after reading everyones thoughts i will keep him for another year and see where we stand then.

Good idea about the yard thing, but we arent really on a yard as such...we went one of the back fields off a very small livery yard, the owners are racing people, so always just have TB's etc not many native pony enthuastiasts lol! :tongue:
 

Vicki100

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Jun 12, 2009
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He sounds like such a lovely boy. I would find it very hard to part with him, I'm sure, but tbh I think it sounds to me as though you might be best off with option A, even though youngsters are a dime a dozen at the moment.

And forgive me if this sounds harsh - his markings and colouring are beautiful as you say, but I think for pony showing, even at local level, his head lacks refinement - it has more of a cob look to it. Though if his temperament and behaviour are top notch that could more than make up for it!

Thanks for the reply Jane :smile:

There are soooo many youngsters around at the moment arent there?? All going for very low money...i just worry i wouldnt even break even...not that its about the money but it seems crazy to make a loss on him.:cold:

No offence taken, i am no expert at the showing malarky :tongue: He has got a massive head, with a big roman nose....but as a mother i think its lovely LOL!! :cloud9:

His dad has the exact same shape head, i have a pic of him somwhere...will dig it out tomorrow!! I think NF's as a breed tend to vary alot, i have seen some teeny little dainty examples then some like buddy who are rather big boned and chunky. Not sure which is correct really??

Vicki, I completely empathise with where you are coming from, having recently been there myself.

He sounds very much like he is at the stage that Bella was, the only difference was that Bella came in every night and as she was only getting very basic handling, she started to become boisterous. This is what really highlighted to me that I was unable to give her the level of attention that she needed.

She also used to stand begging at the gate and was just desperate for attention all the time, but also wasn't physically or mentally ready for backing. I also had plans that she would make a fantastic allrounder for me once Puz fully retires. But realistically, if I didn't have the time to put in, she wouldn't have turned into that fantastic allrounder.

I am also planning a wedding and OH and I are thinking of starting a family in the not too distant future, so I had to concede that I couldn't provide her with what she needed right now. I can honestly say it was the hardest decision to make and I cried so many tears.

However I rehomed her through a scheme that does a lot of screening to ensure that the applicants are genuine, she has been in her new home a week, has been groomed to within an inch of her little life and I've had lots of photos and email updates.

So although it was so hard, I would still make the same decision again.

I guess you just have to seriously think about what it is that he needs, and whether you think you are able to give that to him.

If you want to know more about the scheme I used for Bella, feel free to PM me.

I was hoping you'd reply B&P!!

The scheme sounds really good, even though ive not made any decisions might help jsut talking to them?? (Will PM you!)

I 100% think you made the right decision with Bella hun, i really do!!

Its not like i have no time for him really, i do have time...but its wether its enough to bring him on to a nice standard if that makes sense??

He is a really lovely boy with no nasty vices, the only thing is he likes a confident people which luckily i am with him. I think a nervous person and he would just walk all over them. He is a typical bolshy baby after all lol!! :giggle:

Sorry im rambling now, rather tired...thanks for the reply again B&P will be in touch xx
 
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Vicki100

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Jun 12, 2009
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I would take him for little walks out inhand or even longreining to show him a bit more of the world and give him something else to digest if you feel hes eager to use his brain a bit more. Just repeating the usual things of manners you expect from picking up feet and general handling over this summer. He has stunning colourings. I would be worried about someone wanting him backed and ridden away unless I knew he was going to a word of mouth type home. I would say to keep him ( easy for me to say though isnt it!) and get a feel for his attitude for the next chapter of his life teachings! Alternatively you can post him to me :mstickle:

LOL gimp okay will pack him up in a big giffy bag for you!! :giggle:

That was my intention gimp, to take him to some shows and lots of walks around the village. Which i have done so far but the last month or so has been manic with Buffy & Finn so all those good intentions just disapeared :tongue:
I could do with a kick up the butt!

I think my heart is saying keep him for the time being which isnt a problem, he doesnt cost much to keep and im certainly in no rush to make any hasty decisions!

Its just good to put some fealers out there and get some un biast opinions on the situation.

Thanks for your reply, has been really helpfull!
 

newforest

Well-Known Member
Mar 15, 2008
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Tough one. Not read other replies.

I would probably go with A having taken on my second blank canvas. I avoid any adverts that say backed, riding on etc. I won't know what has been done, how and by who. I am not saying you would make a mess and I am not saying I won't, but any mistakes I have made I keep and resolve because I know about them.

My thinking is who would back if you plan to do option b, if you feel you lack time now you would you need to have unlimited time to back, its not something you do in a week. Going nicely under saddle is if you have an easy one. Would you have extra time on top of the time if it took longer, you came up against any hurdles.

If you feel he is wanting to be occupied, you could show in hand this summer?

When the cob was three, she was doing groundwork every day for twenty minutes, either lunge, long rein, leading, nothing that taxing on the brain but something. I did have a little sit on her and a stroll around the yard, but she wasn't actually backed until last year. She has only really grown into her head, so yours has a lot of growing to do yet. Filling out.
 
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Tina2011

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Mar 23, 2012
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Ahhh Tina yes this is what i wanted everyone to say LOL! :tongue:

I am VERY un-decided, it will take me a good while to figure this out i reckon.

I have definatly got time for once/twice a week things with him, he went on a little walk today in his roller & side reins :angel:

Just out of curosity what are you going to do with your 3yr old?
x

Mine isn't even backed yet. This year I will be introducing to tack and lunging, too teach her the voice aids and build up a few basic muscle in readiness to take a rider. We will continue with her grooming and handling which is all going fine. I will also start leading her out for walks with one of my other mares and then on her own. Only short distances just to introduce her to different things.

All being well I might do a few in hand shows, just for the experience. I wont start riding her properly till next year.

I think its often the same when you have a three year old, they are interested but not really ready for proper work so even if you sold Buddy, who ever buys him wont be able to do that much with him yet.

From picture no.2. He looks to me like he is going to make a very nice pony, so you have plenty of time, don't do anything hasty a lot can happen in a year.

Also once he is 4 years old he will be in a better position to find a good home, for someone to get on, and get on with its so to speak.

You could take him a long to some shows when you are taking the others, just for the experience and something to do, get someone to baby sit him and walk him round the rings etc whilst you are competing.

If he is really good and you have another good lead horse you could also possibly lead him out for small rides with the other horse.

I sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed with having three, I make up little lists of schedules about what I am going to do each day with what:nerd: Most of the time it all fly's out the window:giggle:

I end up saying to my husband, 'I could sell this or that....but'. He is very good at grounding me and putting things back into perspective, so we carry on and things work out:smile:
 

Wally

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Apr 16, 2000
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We have one who is SOOOOO desperate to learn and please and play, so he's being ridden 2 -3 times a week for 30 mins in the school or a 40 minute potter outside, Come the end of May he's being turned away for the summer.
 

Innocence

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Jun 1, 2009
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Vicki, I completely empathise with where you are coming from, having recently been there myself.

He sounds very much like he is at the stage that Bella was, the only difference was that Bella came in every night and as she was only getting very basic handling, she started to become boisterous. This is what really highlighted to me that I was unable to give her the level of attention that she needed.

She also used to stand begging at the gate and was just desperate for attention all the time, but also wasn't physically or mentally ready for backing. I also had plans that she would make a fantastic allrounder for me once Puz fully retires. But realistically, if I didn't have the time to put in, she wouldn't have turned into that fantastic allrounder.

I am also planning a wedding and OH and I are thinking of starting a family in the not too distant future, so I had to concede that I couldn't provide her with what she needed right now. I can honestly say it was the hardest decision to make and I cried so many tears.

However I rehomed her through a scheme that does a lot of screening to ensure that the applicants are genuine, she has been in her new home a week, has been groomed to within an inch of her little life and I've had lots of photos and email updates.

So although it was so hard, I would still make the same decision again.

I guess you just have to seriously think about what it is that he needs, and whether you think you are able to give that to him.

If you want to know more about the scheme I used for Bella, feel free to PM me.


I think using this scheme would be a good idea, i have heard many positive things about them and if i ever needed to rehome either of mine i wouldn't hesitate.
 
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