Play with the horse that shows up...

[Thyme & Me]

...I assume this means something quite specific in Parelli. But I thought it was a really interesting phrase, that has got me thinking......

Mark Rashid (yes him again, sorry. I DO read other people but his books just strike a chord. Anyhow).... Mark Rashid wrote that he once trained a horse who did not like to be ridden. Not scared. Not in pain. Just basically would rather not interact with people or carry us about etc. He managed to get a degree of grudging co-operation from the horse which was a huge improvement from the flat refusal the owner used to get. But Mark always felt a bit bad about working a horse who really did not want to be worked. In that instance the horse who showed up was one that did not like people or want to work with them.

A few days ago Charlie would not be caught for the first time in his life. He had recently moved into a field with 2 pair-bonded mares who wouldn't let him get near either of them. Over the next 2-3 weeks he began sloooooowly to be accepted by them. The night before he wouldn't be caught I saw him sharing a pile of hay for the first time with one of them. The next morning as soon as I approached, all 3 hightailed it away, bucking, playing, swerving, galloping, having a great time.

He appeared to be fairly clear that while I wanted him to come and work he would rather play with his new friends. So what to do? How far do I take the 'partnership' thing? Is there a compromise here, and if so how do I even communicate that I am compromising and I expect him to meet me half way? The horse who showed up was a playful pony who had been a bit lonely and was now accepted and wanted to keep playing. So does that mean I change my plans enjoy watching him play and try again another day?

What if, on the day of a riding lesson, the horse who shows up is the horse who would rather go for a ploddy hack or do some freeschooling or play with his fieldmates. Can we really allow our horses free choice. Will they really choose 'appropriately'. Not got the answers here. I am just wondering how far people will go to listen to their horses if we don't actually like what they have to say!

Incidentally, my 'compromise' was to let him play for 10 minutes. Then I called STAND and he did. He then let himself be caught. He has been fine to catch ever since.

 

[eml]

I am not a natural poster here but absolutely!!

When schooling our own horses we tack up and set off, what we do depends on how the horse feels to us so a planned 20 minutes flatwork session may turn into a belt round the XC field or a jumping session may end up as a 15minutes lets just listen!!

I also do the same with RS lessons, the reactions of the horses, sharp or lazy, bored or listening, dictates what exercises I ask riders to do, once they are experienced enough to work by themselves I encourage the riders to choose appropriate work, it will vary from horse to horse.

 

[annareeves0]

Yes, thats exactly what 'play with the horse that shows up' is all about. I think that was a great compromise and its great to hear EML fitting lessons to suit the horses mood. After all some days Im raring to go and other days cant be arsed and if you try and make me do the opposite, its not going to be fun for either of us.

The phrase is also about not making presumptions about your horse. Just because they 'usually' behave one way, doesnt mean they ALWAYS will, you need to act accordingly. If your usually quiet, obedient plod is feeling fiesty one day and wants to charge around, if you continue to be low energy, non commital, let them get on with it because you know they're 100 % safe, then you're gonna be in trouble. Equally if your gobby, full of confidence cob seems a bit nervous and spooky, charging round past everything at 100 miles an hour wont work. The horse that shows up also may not be the same as the horse that showed up 5 minutes ago - mood can change in a heartbeat and we need to be ready to deal with it.

Its about us not making presumptions, remembering to keep checking in on how they are behaving and to act accordingly Not specific to Parelli, just a way of phrasing it

 

[shockblue]

Hmmm interesting one and I think you are on the right lines. My interpretation of the phrase would be that you have to respond appropriately to the horse at that moment in time. So you might go out with intentions to ride but the horse pulls back when bridling. you should work at that issue by whatever means before proceeding. This may take minutes or hours, whether or not you get to ride would be your ability in that time to help the horse.

It also works on how your horse is feeling. So some days maya is less confident and needs stuff a little slower than usual, other days shes a bit bolshy and I need to be more aware of personal space when around her.

 

[Wally]

But isn't this common sense?

Some days are not two step forward days, some days are give and take days.

 

[Thyme & Me]

But isn't this common sense?

ARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHH :stomp::stomp::stomp:

I can't tell you how irritated (jealous!) I get when people say 'but surely that's just COMMON SENSE....'! If you - like me - had parents who had zero interest in horses and you - like me - lived in a city and ALL your 'horsemanship' came courtesy of the local riding school(s) then you - like me- will have had almost no opportunity to learn 'horse sense'. You learn "make him listen" not "communicate more clearly"; you learn "show him who's boss" not "foster a relationship"; you learn "pack it in (whack)" not "teach him to stand"....... Etc etc etc etc

I agree that there have ALWAYS been great horse-people around throughout history and in all cultures - esp I guess those whose lives were intertwined horses all the time in day to day work - but these folks aren't generally hanging round the local riding schools imparting wisdom!

If I had said to ANY of my horse riding instructors that horsey didn't really want to work today so perhaps we should listen, I would have been laughed off the yard. I honestly didn't know if the replies on this thread would have been: 'for god sake, get a grip. Who's in charge here?' Not 'sure, let the horse tell you what he wants to do...'

I need to have I AM CLUELESS. PLEASE DON'T TELL ME IT'S ALL OBVIOUS as my signature strip I think

 

[shockblue]

Lol Charlie I know what you mean! Sometimes you are just so busy trying to please those around you common sense doesn't prevail! I too have had to learn it, i was always really worried about doing it right and believed that when anything went wrong it was the naughty horse which is how I had been programmed from a very young age at riding school to think.

It really is lovely to actually be able to learn this stuff and have a structured program, which admittedly I don't follow any more, but I still have lessons, read books and study hard most weeks.

I love watching people like Dave Stuart ride because when he rides he doesn't think about himself, he's only there for the horse 100% of the time which is why he is always amazing with all types of horse.

I was always taught to focus on myself and what i was doing and so it was easy to forget the horse.

I'm still learning to adapt myself to different horses. Maya is complete polar opposite to my old boy who I got to level 3 with so I'm having to learn it all again.

 

[Wally]

Kids are the same, some days you can get them to do anything, some days the status-quo is all you can be happy with.

We have a saying, set your horse and yourself up to succeed. It's no good going at a horse like a bull at a gate when he's not in the mood. You have to change direction slightly and get what you want though different methods. That way you never fail.

 

[LindaAd]

Um, yes, but I see what Charlie's asking... I suppose some horses are more honest than others, and I'm assuming that there's no soreness or discomfort, but I find with Hebe, if you do what she chooses, then she'll choose to do less next time.

We had it with being spooky; out on a ride, getting dark, she seemed genuinely worried, so I got off and led. The next day she seemed worried as soon as we got out of the gate. We had it with trot: 'Haflingers don't trot in the school' with foot-stamping and tail-swishing. So I check my position, ask more gently, wait until she changes her mind ... Next day "I don't think I'll walk today".

So it's always a compromise, isn't it?

 

[Yann]

It's an interesting question I don't think there's anything wrong with compromising if it seems like the right thing to do, but on the other hand I'm not going to leave a horse running round a field when there's an endurance ride to go to If we're after a partnership then that implies responsibilities on both sides, our job is to make sure what we're asking of them work wise is fair and reasonable, theirs is to work for us. If we can find something they enjoy or are good at to do most of the time then so much the better.

 

[shockblue]

If I went along with what Maya wanted to do all the time we would never get anything done, she'd always vote for staying in the field and eating!

It just means you have to act appropriately to how your horse is feeling that moment so what worked one day might not work the next. So rather than assuming that she's fine for me to get on that day I just do my own little checks with the saddle, move her about a bit and make sure there are no sticky feet and then when Im onboard I check again for sticky feet and the emergency brake.

 

[sjp1]

but I find with Hebe, if you do what she chooses, then she'll choose to do less next time.

We had it with being spooky; out on a ride, getting dark, she seemed genuinely worried, so I got off and led. The next day she seemed worried as soon as we got out of the gate. We had it with trot: 'Haflingers don't trot in the school' with foot-stamping and tail-swishing. So I check my position, ask more gently, wait until she changes her mind ... Next day "I don't think I'll walk today".

Hee hee!!!! You are describing Toby there perfectly!!

 

[OwnedbyChanter]

I understand the quote but have two schools of thought. Firstly Chanter can be a horse in his field with his mate 22 hours a day. I require his attention for 2 hours day ish. That said, when I bring him in I am assessing his mood and if I can choose the approate sessions, flat work, jumping, hacking or free schooling but what I pick I will make him work at it.

My RI is very keep on saying at the start of each session ride the walk/trot he is giving you until he is settled and ready to work. Once we start 'work' I ask using the correct aids and I expect him to listen if he does not listen I hold firm on my aids and wait for him to come to me.

This is 'playing the horse that shows up' to an extent.