Sleep tight Leo, taken too too soon
- Thread starter diplomaticandtactful
- Start date
i am just in shock, he was only 12....he was right as rain yesterday galloping around happy. tonight he is cold. it's just too awful.
When the shock wears off and you start on the what ifs please remember that you acted in his best interests and nothing you did caused this. Try to be as kind to yourself as you were to him xx
i worked for the last two years so hard on his weight loss we built tracks, small enclosures, he was fed straw, he had lost a lot of weight, it was a dreadful strain always trying to figure out what more you could do. Genetically he was bred for meat, bred to be eaten, so the aim was to produce a heavy horse as they ae sold by the kg.....so you are fighting his genetics all the time.
What i have to remember all the time is that he came to me feral, dumped off a lorry. We made the mistake of turning him out and didn't see him for three months as couldn't catch him. He came in himself in the winter after a week of rain, and then we started work on him. When he died, he was perfect to handle with farrier dentist and vet. He could do the most amazing liberty work - he did some yesterday afternoon in the field when the pain relief was working, he did circles, figures of eight, serpentines, we even did some of our dances as we used to dance as he would mirror me totally. He taught me how to judge exactly when to back off and reduce pressure, as he was originally extremely flight and you couldn't hold him if he got uncomfortable, you just went and caught him and started again. But i got really good at judging just when he was about to and bring him to me and reward him and make him feel good and proud.
He was the gentlest nicest pony, i forgive him for nearly amputing my thumb on the gate, and i am just utterly miserable that he is gone.
What i have to remember all the time is that he came to me feral, dumped off a lorry. We made the mistake of turning him out and didn't see him for three months as couldn't catch him. He came in himself in the winter after a week of rain, and then we started work on him. When he died, he was perfect to handle with farrier dentist and vet. He could do the most amazing liberty work - he did some yesterday afternoon in the field when the pain relief was working, he did circles, figures of eight, serpentines, we even did some of our dances as we used to dance as he would mirror me totally. He taught me how to judge exactly when to back off and reduce pressure, as he was originally extremely flight and you couldn't hold him if he got uncomfortable, you just went and caught him and started again. But i got really good at judging just when he was about to and bring him to me and reward him and make him feel good and proud.
He was the gentlest nicest pony, i forgive him for nearly amputing my thumb on the gate, and i am just utterly miserable that he is gone.
got up really early to do the team and let them say goodbye as digger man coming early, he is now 1 1/2 hours late
That’s tough, hope your not feeling too awful this morning.
It’s lovely you can bury him x
I'm so sorry, but your last post screams that you knew him and when he'd had enough and I'm sure that is the instinct you leaned on to make the dreaded decision, he was obviously loved x
last night it kind of hit me he was gone, you have the horrible making the decision and carrying it out, watching him being dragged up the field to a cold muddy hole and walking away - all a horror of its own kind. then later on the realisation you will never see those perky little ears and little star, and the crinkly Roger Daltry mane and his beautiful little hooves which were so clean and perfect as he lay overnight under a rug with just his little hooves showing. and his lovely little trots and canters. he was a very happy camper, full of joy. and very gentle and kind, very bonded with me. his ears were always on me and i loved him. he did nothing all his life except stay at home with his mates so i guess that's not too bad.
it was like Molly, Ferguson, the suddenness of it, the totally out of the blue horror of finding them in pain and knowing that this was probably not going to end well, no matter what you did. you know when you put a brave face on with the vet and we do the possible treatment having already had the conversation from the outset that if you really want to save him you try to load a pony in a lot of pain, drive him two hours, subject him to a lot of extensive surgery, which has a very limited long term success rate. By deciding that we were not going to do down that route - having already lost two one to colic surgery one to cancer surgery where we threw £12K at them and failed and both had miserable deaths - we condemned him to death when it went surgical but he suffered for less time by being monitored at home. He improved, and was cheerful then the pain relief wore off, and i get the vet out instantly and we discussed whether there was anything more to be done. Anything we did she felt was just kicking the problem down the road and the outcome would be the same so we ended it. He went quietly without a fuss being cuddled and talked to. God knows i have had to do this with them so many times that the vet doesn't need to warn me about them falling and to be careful. It's just so bloody sad that a relatively young horse who i worried about what would happen to him if i got too old to look after him goes before me. Don;t have that worry now of course.
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