Confidence courses
- Thread starter squidsin
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Yes please do - I think I looked at that one didn't I? Please could you send me the link.
I'm in South Bucks, Nat. Berkshire/Oxfordshire/Bedfordshire/Herts are all do-able.
Wow, that's quite expensive though! £545 for a 3 day riding holiday and that doesn't include accommodation - I've seen the same thing in Spain for a lot less!
I don't know if it would help but one of my exam students was incredibly nervous about her riding as well as the exam. She went to a sports psychologist and hypnotist and went from being someone who would not ride in the indoor school without seeing the horse ridden first on to doing her stage 3 exam including SJ and XC. She is Midlands based but I can see if she has any recommendations.
That would be fantastic, thanks eml. Midlands is accessible from here (just up the M40), plus I have family there. I've actually just contacted a local hypnotherapist as may as well give that a go too! I just need to somehow break out of the cycle of 'I can't do it' negativity that I've got myself into riding-wise. I CAN ride!
Cathy Sirett works in your area. FTH on here or http://www.effectivehorsemanship.com/
She helped me massively with my confidence issues and supported me to go from 'haven't ridden in over a year and nauseous at the mere thought of getting on my horse' to 'going solo to novice endurance rides in the new forest' in less than 18 months. She gave me the tools to manage my own confidence and get past the irrational feelings, but also to recognise that not all of my fears were irrational and I had to become a better rider!
The trick is whether or not you then go on to working hard at it, using the tools that you were given or, as many people do, they attend the course but continue on the old same path, doing the same thing. You have to be ready and willing to take it all on board, keep pushing the edges of that comfort zone and keep on working at it. No one is going to 'fix you' but they can help you learn how to fix yourself
Best of luck whatever you decide.
She helped me massively with my confidence issues and supported me to go from 'haven't ridden in over a year and nauseous at the mere thought of getting on my horse' to 'going solo to novice endurance rides in the new forest' in less than 18 months. She gave me the tools to manage my own confidence and get past the irrational feelings, but also to recognise that not all of my fears were irrational and I had to become a better rider!
The trick is whether or not you then go on to working hard at it, using the tools that you were given or, as many people do, they attend the course but continue on the old same path, doing the same thing. You have to be ready and willing to take it all on board, keep pushing the edges of that comfort zone and keep on working at it. No one is going to 'fix you' but they can help you learn how to fix yourself
Best of luck whatever you decide.
Cathy Sirett works in your area. FTH on here or http://www.effectivehorsemanship.com/
She helped me massively with my confidence issues and supported me to go from 'haven't ridden in over a year and nauseous at the mere thought of getting on my horse' to 'going solo to novice endurance rides in the new forest' in less than 18 months. She gave me the tools to manage my own confidence and get past the irrational feelings, but also to recognise that not all of my fears were irrational and I had to become a better rider!
The trick is whether or not you then go on to working hard at it, using the tools that you were given or, as many people do, they attend the course but continue on the old same path, doing the same thing. You have to be ready and willing to take it all on board, keep pushing the edges of that comfort zone and keep on working at it. No one is going to 'fix you' but they can help you learn how to fix yourself
Best of luck whatever you decide.
I've dropped her an email so will see what she says. Thanks Anna. Did you really not ride your horse for a year? That gives me hope that I can get over this stupid blip!
Rosie is a dominant mare who dropped her head and shoulder every walk to trot transition and had me off many times, until eventually I refused to get back on. She trained me well! I was just too novice and not a good enough leader to deal with it. I did have a lot to learn but by the time I had the skills, my bottle had gone. Didn't ride for well over a year and when I did get back on it was tiny baby steps and I built up from there. Tools and determination!!!!
I think I have that hacking with confidence cd somewhere, if you want a copy, pm me your address and I'll send it on. Courtesy of sjp1 btw - she very kindly lent it to me so just passing on the karma!
You should have a read of Anna's blog squidsin, she was one of the reasons I stuck it out, seeing how much she has achieved, made it all seem possible!
I was a guinea pig for some EMDR therapy a colleague was training in at my lowest point. I couldn't even get on my horse, I'd stand there on the block staring at the stirrup and just couldn't bring myself to swing my leg over that saddle and end up in a pile on the floor.
You should have a read of Anna's blog squidsin, she was one of the reasons I stuck it out, seeing how much she has achieved, made it all seem possible!
I was a guinea pig for some EMDR therapy a colleague was training in at my lowest point. I couldn't even get on my horse, I'd stand there on the block staring at the stirrup and just couldn't bring myself to swing my leg over that saddle and end up in a pile on the floor.
Personally, I think you just have to keep chipping away at issues.
I found riding lessons on my own horse VERY helpful. I am not sure they made me any stickier in the saddle, but if he gets over excited now, I can make him leg yield or drop onto the bit etc. Nothing stops him bucking in times of high excitement, but the more he does the better he gets.
And I find the same. The more I do the less nervy I get. Sometimes you have to push your comfort zone a bit, it is not always pleasant but it is helpful.
Personally I would say it all depends on what you want to do with your horse. Sometimes you can't always be babysat and looked after, and only ever do things within your comfort zone, but I think to start with that is what you need. However, as time goes on and you hack out with loads of horses, or do fun rides where people overtake you, it isn't really fabby to start with, but kind of you have to deal with it because that is what is happening at that moment and then you realise that yes, your horse is getting excited, but you are there and you have to deal with it, and when you have you get more confident - if that makes any sense!!
I have done ridden courses, classroom courses, and I have to say they didn't help me at all. I know they do help people, but they didn't really help me.
Repetition and lessons and a good and supportive YO helped me.
Edited to add, it does all depend on why you are nervous. If your horse is difficult and has bucked you off etc. as mine did, pretending it didn't happen or shying away fromt he issue isn't helpful. If it is just in your mind, then courses probably do help
I found riding lessons on my own horse VERY helpful. I am not sure they made me any stickier in the saddle, but if he gets over excited now, I can make him leg yield or drop onto the bit etc. Nothing stops him bucking in times of high excitement, but the more he does the better he gets.
And I find the same. The more I do the less nervy I get. Sometimes you have to push your comfort zone a bit, it is not always pleasant but it is helpful.
Personally I would say it all depends on what you want to do with your horse. Sometimes you can't always be babysat and looked after, and only ever do things within your comfort zone, but I think to start with that is what you need. However, as time goes on and you hack out with loads of horses, or do fun rides where people overtake you, it isn't really fabby to start with, but kind of you have to deal with it because that is what is happening at that moment and then you realise that yes, your horse is getting excited, but you are there and you have to deal with it, and when you have you get more confident - if that makes any sense!!
I have done ridden courses, classroom courses, and I have to say they didn't help me at all. I know they do help people, but they didn't really help me.
Repetition and lessons and a good and supportive YO helped me.
Edited to add, it does all depend on why you are nervous. If your horse is difficult and has bucked you off etc. as mine did, pretending it didn't happen or shying away fromt he issue isn't helpful. If it is just in your mind, then courses probably do help
It's a bit of both with me. My horse has bronked me off 4 times since I got her in Feb. On the other hand, that's 4 times out of a whole lot of rides when she was absolutely good as gold (3 in a way as 2 of those were on the same occasion - she bronked me off, I got back on, she did it again). It's the unpredictability of it that freaks me out. I don't really know if it was a physical issue that caused it or not. I wouldn't say she's a difficult horse though, she doesn't do anything else naughty. She doesn't nap or rear or drop her shoulder or do anything cheeky. But her doing those bronks is what's put The Fear into me. So I am doing my best to address EVERYTHING - get her checked over, I'm probably going to get a new saddle, physio coming out next week, and also work on my own issues because now I am nervous about riding full stop, not just riding on her. TBH I have always been a bit fearful about hacking too.
Thats a tricky one.
Personally I would say that if twice in the same timeframe she had you off, and generally she isn't difficult, that it is a physical thing - but I think I have said that before.
With my own horse, I know that he bucks when he is excited. When he is super excited he broncs. I can sit the bucks, but the broncs is when he has me off.
For us this has been very difficult. I know that if he repeats the exciting things he calms down, but for me repeating the difficult thing is nerve wracking because he goes into meltdown.
The ridden course I went on was lovely - but controlled. Tobes is fine in a 'controlled environment' He pulls when excited - most horses do. He jogs when excited - most horses do. When excited but in normal mode, whether it be on the road or off road if another horse comes up behind he kicks out. Thats fine. Well not super really because I don't want him kicking other horses, but I won't come off!!!
When things get altogether too exciting, he goes into bronc mode and I cannot sit bucking, leaping up in the air and twisting and I would challenge anyone to!! This is what has scared me.
So I have to get my horse over the very exciting issues, and I have chipped away at this slowly and managed three fun rides over the last year and stayed on. Yes, he bucks in the first canters, but thats fine, I can manage that.
For you, I would say your horse has a different issue. Something is causing her to bronc. If it isn't an exciting issue, then it is a pain issue. Horses almost always do something for a reason, and if she is not highly strung then there will be a reason.
This is a very different confidence issue to someone who is worried for no reason, or worried that their horse puts in the odd buck, or that their horse is strong - for instance I hacked out with a couple of liveries this weekend and one was on tenterhooks because her horse was in season and was a bit strong. Of course we all did everything we could to make sure that she was happy, but actually, the worst that mare would do would put in a buck - and a small one at that. She is nervous, but not for any particular reason - the only time she has come off the horse is because it put in a stop at a jump.
So I think you are right to check out the physical first. That where I would say her problem is - maybe the saddle is sitting down too much, or the girth is pinching her, or there is a issue somewhere there.
Long and boring ............. sorry¬!!!
Personally I would say that if twice in the same timeframe she had you off, and generally she isn't difficult, that it is a physical thing - but I think I have said that before.
With my own horse, I know that he bucks when he is excited. When he is super excited he broncs. I can sit the bucks, but the broncs is when he has me off.
For us this has been very difficult. I know that if he repeats the exciting things he calms down, but for me repeating the difficult thing is nerve wracking because he goes into meltdown.
The ridden course I went on was lovely - but controlled. Tobes is fine in a 'controlled environment' He pulls when excited - most horses do. He jogs when excited - most horses do. When excited but in normal mode, whether it be on the road or off road if another horse comes up behind he kicks out. Thats fine. Well not super really because I don't want him kicking other horses, but I won't come off!!!
When things get altogether too exciting, he goes into bronc mode and I cannot sit bucking, leaping up in the air and twisting and I would challenge anyone to!! This is what has scared me.
So I have to get my horse over the very exciting issues, and I have chipped away at this slowly and managed three fun rides over the last year and stayed on. Yes, he bucks in the first canters, but thats fine, I can manage that.
For you, I would say your horse has a different issue. Something is causing her to bronc. If it isn't an exciting issue, then it is a pain issue. Horses almost always do something for a reason, and if she is not highly strung then there will be a reason.
This is a very different confidence issue to someone who is worried for no reason, or worried that their horse puts in the odd buck, or that their horse is strong - for instance I hacked out with a couple of liveries this weekend and one was on tenterhooks because her horse was in season and was a bit strong. Of course we all did everything we could to make sure that she was happy, but actually, the worst that mare would do would put in a buck - and a small one at that. She is nervous, but not for any particular reason - the only time she has come off the horse is because it put in a stop at a jump.
So I think you are right to check out the physical first. That where I would say her problem is - maybe the saddle is sitting down too much, or the girth is pinching her, or there is a issue somewhere there.
Long and boring ............. sorry¬!!!
I can't sit a bronk either. Well, I can a bit - the second time she did it after I'd got back on, I did actually stay in the saddle (well, near it anyway) with my RI shouting 'don't try and sit it, get off, get off!' So I sort of vaulted off her backwards! Landed on my feet, as I did the other time she did it. Years ago, I was a pretty good gymnast and it seems the ability to land on my feet is the one thing that's stayed with me (I can still do a head stand actually but tumbling and the splits are a bit beyond me, 25 years and 2 kids later!)
If a horse REALLY wants to get you off, it will!
Pops gets nervous, but my RI who has ridden her for me says any 'naughty' behaviour from her isn't naughtiness but fear. I've rarely even seen her buck in the field, and if she does, it's because other horses are hooning around. Her main 'naughtiness' is that she's a kick-along ride rather than anywhere like forward going, which doesn't really fit in with the bronking profile. And this is a horse I trust round my 2-year old daughter (not completely, I am not an idiot, but Poppy does seem to rather like Savannah.)
If a horse REALLY wants to get you off, it will!
Pops gets nervous, but my RI who has ridden her for me says any 'naughty' behaviour from her isn't naughtiness but fear. I've rarely even seen her buck in the field, and if she does, it's because other horses are hooning around. Her main 'naughtiness' is that she's a kick-along ride rather than anywhere like forward going, which doesn't really fit in with the bronking profile. And this is a horse I trust round my 2-year old daughter (not completely, I am not an idiot, but Poppy does seem to rather like Savannah.)
I think that confidence courses only work if you are working with your own horse on your own problems. I think that money would be better spent on having more lessons with Poppy at your yard.
Yes I agree with this and with what sjp has said, although I'm one for the psychology stuff so I like to understand why I think the way I do and how best to cope with it. I had one conversation with Cathy (fth) on the phone and her simple strategies helped me to work with my nerves rather than always feeling like I was against them. It's almost like your head is split in two - the old self, the one that remembers being gung-ho, happy to ride in any circumstance and just wants to get on with it, versus the new nervy whoosey self that you just wants to run for the hills. I spent a lot of time with my old self wanting to shake my whoosey self and slap it around the head for being so stupidly unconfident and limiting.
Heh ho, you'll get there.
PS, cd in the post tonight mrs, sorry later than planned, I realised I didn't have any blank discs left :wink:
I nearly fell over reading the price not to include acomodation!!. I would rather have a coach to me on my horse in my surroundings to be honest.
Not saying it won't help some it depends how you learn.
Move closer stay longer by Stephanie Burns I think it was called helped my friend. It is about your comfort zones and stepping outside and back in again. Then you stay out of the zone a bit longer and a bit longer until you not notice it anymore.
Eta-book link
http://teachoncelearntwice.com.au/recommended/193-2/
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