how to move forward?

[Nina.]

What's the best way of progressing from a weekly riding school rider to horse ownership? It is my ultimate goal, and as it is for many of us, something I've wanted since I was a child (now 23) and I have had to stop sharing a horse recently due to him being unsuitable for me at this stage of coming back to riding.

I am desperate not to be a weekly riding school rider, having been one for many years with the odd part loan horse, and I think that the less I ride the more my grip on being a horse owner slips away along with my confidence but at the moment what with my working full time and getting in late-ish (7 ish), having a great instructor where I am meaning I don't want to move schools- but no suitable horses to ride or loan apart from 1 there, and it's also very hard to find schools that are open late weeknights locally, I am having a conundrum.

I wonder if I would be biting off more than I can chew what with my work and study, and if I should stick to being a weekly rider at least for now? This option doesn't particularly thrill me obviously and I feel like I've been desperately fighting this from happening but I can't deny that it would make life easier and enable me to save money...to perhaps buy a horse.

Has anyone had an informal arrangement with an instructor who teaches them regarding riding and horse care/lunging and all the trimmings perhaps at the weekend? How do you fit in learning / getting better around working? Did you cut back on riding etc to save to then buy one?

How did you all learn the ropes (those of you who didn't learn as a child)? And for those who rode as a child, how did you get back in to it to go on to buy a horse?

I am considering continuing with my BHS exams (I have passed stage 1 riding) and getting to stage 2 to help my knowledge and confidence...but fitting it in will also be very difficult as well as paying for it. Did anyone dive in and buy a horse with gaps in their knowledge? People have had differing opinions on this with some saying that the most experienced horse owners probably would fail some aspects of the exams, with others being very encouraging....all opinions welcome.

 

[Trewsers]

OH and I bought our own as adults - with huge gaps in our knowledge. But, we were on a super knowledgeable yard with helpful staff and liveries - this is where we also took a regular amount of lessons. I think if you read as much as you can and learn / soak it all up it helps. I don't think its a good idea plunging in without knowing the basics but I think so long as you are willing to learn and can call on folk for help it can work out. A good relationship with your vet is also essential. Ours were great in the early years and gave us tons of support and help.

 

[Nina.]

OH and I bought our own as adults - with huge gaps in our knowledge. But, we were on a super knowledgeable yard with helpful staff and liveries - this is where we also took a regular amount of lessons. I think if you read as much as you can and learn / soak it all up it helps. I don't think its a good idea plunging in without knowing the basics but I think so long as you are willing to learn and can call on folk for help it can work out. A good relationship with your vet is also essential. Ours were great in the early years and gave us tons of support and help.

Did the people on the yard judge / look down on you for buying a horse with gaps in your knowledge or were they just eager to help? I know I shouldn't but I always wonder what others would say if I bought a horse at the level I'm at now...I definitely know the basics and could be a responsible owner for sure as I am perfectly happy to admit when I don't know. But I am always interested about the reactions of those around first time novice owners...most adverts are "no novices please!!!" when all we want to do is learn!

 

[Trewsers]

Did the people on the yard judge / look down on you for buying a horse with gaps in your knowledge or were they just eager to help? I know I shouldn't but I always wonder what others would say if I bought a horse at the level I'm at now...I definitely know the basics and could be a responsible owner for sure as I am perfectly happy to admit when I don't know. But I am always interested about the reactions of those around first time novice owners...most adverts are "no novices please!!!" when all we want to do is learn!

No, nobody looked down on us - least I never noticed if they did! Most folk just wanted to help and were glad to impart their knowledge. Took me a while to catch on on which bits to discard mind
It is hard to know when the time is right. We'd been having twice weekly lessons for about six months - not long at all! I had a wee bit of experience as a child/teen but not a lot really. One January OH just told me to get on with looking for a horse to buy instead of keep day dreaming - who was I to argue?! Lol

 

[LindaAd]

Everyone who buys a horse has huge gaps in their knowledge - having your own horse is quite different from riding school horses. The important thing is to start with the right horse (although I know lots of people don't, and they survive too) and to make sure that you have plenty of help nearby. As for finding the time, well, only you can answer that one. Have you worked out how you would keep your horse, and how much time and money it's likely to need? My advice would be that if it's a struggle, you'd be better off waiting, because there's no point doing it if you're too stressed to enjoy it, but I know a lot of people would say just go for it and it'll work out OK.

 

[Nina.]

Everyone who buys a horse has huge gaps in their knowledge - having your own horse is quite different from riding school horses. The important thing is to start with the right horse (although I know lots of people don't, and they survive too) and to make sure that you have plenty of help nearby. As for finding the time, well, only you can answer that one. Have you worked out how you would keep your horse, and how much time and money it's likely to need? My advice would be that if it's a struggle, you'd be better off waiting, because there's no point doing it if you're too stressed to enjoy it, but I know a lot of people would say just go for it and it'll work out OK.

I have roughly crunched some numbers, and to pay for full livery, in order to save time (which I would prefer to do or at least assisted DIY) its about 450 pcm, plus any "human rent" on top (I live at home and only pay a small amount at present) but would be looking to move out next year which complicates things as well as perhaps saving to buy a flat with my OH at the same time. Never mind bills, vets fees if any, farriers, added extras, petrol and keeping up my riding lessons at least fortnightly which I feel I would need, keeping up an emergency fund as well in case of unforeseen events. I am torn though as I feel like I would miss out on the fun parts of being an owner if I kept my horse on full livery. But I'm not sure....but at the moment it's just out of reach. Perhaps one pay rise later and I might be there!

 

[Skib]

Can you find another share? That is the least expensive way of supplementing riding lessons. I am not a good person to urge you to buy as I have constantly deferred that, tho I did have a lovely share.
I have ridden twice a week for many years at riding schools and my experience is that one can get both continuity and a long personal relationship with a particular horse within a riding school frame work. In this area it costs me much less than full livery and one knows the horses are exercised if one has a busy patch with work or is away on holiday.

 

[Nina.]

Can you find another share? That is the least expensive way of supplementing riding lessons. I am not a good person to urge you to buy as I have constantly deferred that, tho I did have a lovely share.
I have ridden twice a week for many years at riding schools and my experience is that one can get both continuity and a long personal relationship with a particular horse within a riding school frame work. In this area it costs me much less than full livery and one knows the horses are exercised if one has a busy patch with work or is away on holiday.

Do you think sharing is better than trying to pass my BHS exams? They're very expensive to do I know but I would like the teaching, sharers often need people who can "just get on with it" and don't want to have to babysit their sharers. If I found myself in a situation like that I'd never learn to lunge or any of the things I could pick up doing the exams. My RI has offered lunge lessons but I think more of a passing offer than a real commitment to helping especially as I can only do evenings/weekends.

I would like to try though, I am thinking if I can try and find a share on a weekend day which will be much easier for me but they are hard to come by and perhaps also do chores as I have time to do them on a weekend...and if a weekend day then I can possibly look at other yards to share at.

P.S. Skib love the quote in your signature, very good.

 

[Kite_Rider]

Firstly don't imagine that riding less will mean your dream will slip away. I spent about 30 years not riding but still have my own now - you just need to be patient and as my lovely Mum always says if you want something bad enough and you work hard you will get there in the end.
Anyhow, yes I had huge gaps in my knowledge, I doubt anyone even folk who have had horses for years can ever know all there is to know, we are always learning I think as long as we keep an open mind.
I shared for about 2 years in total before I got my own horse and my share and his owner taught me loads! I didn't even know how to muck out back then.
If I were you I would go down the share route - the right one is out there honestly. That way you can have all the fun of 'owning' your own but to fit in better with your time and money situation.
As for being looked down on, no I never was, quite the opposite in fact, it still amazes me to this day that people ask me for my opinion. But a lot of that I think is just down to the fact that I'm older and much more confident with my self and my decisions, you will if you are on a livery yard get lots of help and most people are more than happy to share there two pence worth if you ask for it or not and there is bound to be folk who won't mind in the slightest if you ask them for advice.
All is not lost Nina, enjoy your horse time however it comes and be one hundred percent honest with yourself about the commitment you can give if you take on a horse of your own. It really is a lifestyle not a hobby.

 

[LindaAd]

Moving out, buying a new flat with your OH, studying, working - honestly, I don't think you have time for a horse at the moment. A share, one or two days a week, to add to your lessons, seems like the best plan to me.

 

[Kite_Rider]

Oh and think about this too, you said you would have to pay about £450 a month to own your horse as would have to go on full livery, well just work out how many lessons you could have for that? and you wouldn't have the rest of the bills to pay either like dentist/vets/farrier/feed/hay/bedding/rugs/saddlery/grooming kit etc etc

 

[Nina.]

Thanks everybody....

Think I just don't want to admit that it's too much too soon! I've never been the most patient person so it's really hard for me. But perhaps if I try and find a share that I can ride alongside my lesson weekly at the school that would be good and then get more experience doing chores on the weekend. Or if I find a good arrangement I might ask my instructor if she is able to teach private clients on the side, so if I did find a share she could teach me once a week on a share horse.

Like you say, it's a lifestyle, and clearly not one that fits perfectly with having to work in a city and commute home every day. So in the future I might reconsider that choice when I am more experienced/qualified and have more options....but that's a question for the future.

 

[Kite_Rider]

Shame you are not near me ... you could come and ride my little pudding on the weekends as I work and you could do as many 'chores' as you liked

 

[Nina.]

If only. Most people don't like having sharers on weekends I've found! Although that's mainly from scouring Preloved I have to say....I might post an ad and see what comes of it....

 

[Jessey]

Could you perhaps volunteer at your or another riding school at the weekends? Or perhaps riding for the disabled as they are often grateful of adult helpers, helping out is a great way to learn lots of the stable management side, personally I prefer practical learning over books, and I think there are some BHS practices which are a little outdated and/or the PC point of view but none the less the stages are a good starting point

 

[Flipo's Mum]

I'd put an ad up in a local tack shop asking if someone wants help at the weekend come show season, sort of like a groom. I helped my mate for a couple of years just being with her horse while she went to register, taking photos at ringside and just generally being moral support! Yes you're not going to be guaranteed riding opportunities out of it but it's time spent with horses and you learn heaps.
Of course I wouldn't be expecting to get paid for this and I'd make it clear in your ad. You never know, you might come across someone with a couple of horses who needs some help and it could grow arms and legs in a good way!

My non horsey parents bought us ponies when we were kids. We knew nothing and survived with common sense and knowing when to ask for help. I'm sure folk around us thought we were stupid but they were well cared for and we had years of fun. I had a break of around ten years from when I went to uni until my 30th bday, apart from the occasional holiday hack, and I just jumped in and bought. Upon reflection, it wasnt the best plan, a case of not quite the right horse, but we got the right support and five years later we are very happy hackers. There will always be someone out there to judge the decisions we make, but as far as I'm concerned, as long as you keep safe and the horse is happy and healthy, they can think what they bloody well like! I'm sorry, but I'm a bit reluctant to sit an exam on horse ownership. The best experience is gained through doing as far as I'm concerned, so hanging about as much as possible, seeing if you can help out on a yard, all good opportunities. Unfortunately it doesn't sound like you're in a position financially and time wise to buy yet, but it depends how determined you are!

 

[squidsin]

I didn't ride (apart from the occasional lesson/hack) between 16 and 36, when I decided to start riding again on maternity leave after my last baby. She is nearly 4 now and I have my own horse! I just jumped right in but I have a supportive husband, we own our own house and do OK, and I work from home so can just about fit everything in with work/kids/house/horse! It IS hard, and I couldn't have done it when I was a singleton living in London, as I had no disposable income at that point in time. In fact I had no disposable income until I was about 30, despite working in decent jobs, that is London for you! All the young people I know with horses still live with their parents. Not sure I actually want to be supporting my own kids' expensive hobbies when they are in their 20s! I think Flipo's Mum's suggestion is a good one. Maybe put out some feelers on local horsey FB groups and in your local tack shop seeing if anyone is looking for a sharer/help with their horse?

 

[Mary Poppins]

It's difficult to 'have it all' but where there is a will there is a way (or something like that!) and if you want something badly enough then you will make it happen.

I have been riding all my life with a few years break from university. I live within commuting distance from London and if I had chosen to I could have got a proper graduate recruitment job and doubled my earnings. However the thought of working stupid hours and travelling at least 2 hours per day just didn't appeal. I took a local job (with a company I still work for) and managed to negotiate my working hours from 7am till 3pm. The meant that my afternoons were free for horses. I always knew that I wanted children and I didn't want to sell any horse that I purchased, so I spent about 8 years loaning/sharing/having lessons/helping out at riding schools etc. etc. I have had about 5 share horses and then managed to get to know the owner of a local riding school where I used to loan a beautiful shire horse. In return I helped out on the yard and also got to ride the other riding school horses. It was an amazing time and I learnt so much and made great friends. I used to spend every day from 3:15pm till 7pm at the yard and then 7am till 12pm at weekends.

I then got married and had 2 children and when my youngest was 18 months old I bought Ben who is the love of my life. I keep him on part livery on a lovely yard which costs more than my mortgage! Juggling 2 children, a part time job and a horse can be tricky but with the support of my husband who has never complained about the cost of keeping him it 's all made possible.

So you could say that my life choices have revolved around my love of horses. My career has never really taken off, my day is planned around riding my horse and weekends and holidays are all planned in advance so I can do what I want to do with him. But I wouldn't change a thing.

 

[Jayne]

It's difficult to 'have it all' but where there is a will there is a way (or something like that!) and if you want something badly enough then you will make it happen.

I have been riding all my life with a few years break from university. I live within commuting distance from London and if I had chosen to I could have got a proper graduate recruitment job and doubled my earnings. However the thought of working stupid hours and travelling at least 2 hours per day just didn't appeal. I took a local job (with a company I still work for) and managed to negotiate my working hours from 7am till 3pm. The meant that my afternoons were free for horses. I always knew that I wanted children and I didn't want to sell any horse that I purchased, so I spent about 8 years loaning/sharing/having lessons/helping out at riding schools etc. etc. I have had about 5 share horses and then managed to get to know the owner of a local riding school where I used to loan a beautiful shire horse. In return I helped out on the yard and also got to ride the other riding school horses. It was an amazing time and I learnt so much and made great friends. I used to spend every day from 3:15pm till 7pm at the yard and then 7am till 12pm at weekends.

I then got married and had 2 children and when my youngest was 18 months old I bought Ben who is the love of my life. I keep him on part livery on a lovely yard which costs more than my mortgage! Juggling 2 children, a part time job and a horse can be tricky but with the support of my husband who has never complained about the cost of keeping him it 's all made possible.

So you could say that my life choices have revolved around my love of horses. My career has never really taken off, my day is planned around riding my horse and weekends and holidays are all planned in advance so I can do what I want to do with him. But I wouldn't change a thing.

That was a nice read.
I've waited all my life for what I've got now, and your exctly right, if you want something bad enough 'where there's a will there's a way ' [emoji274]

 

[ponylover88]

Apologies if you've already mentioned this but where are you based roughly? I'd suggest you look into a share horse if you want more than a weekly lesson at a RS, but can't dedicate the time or finances to a horse.

I got my first horse aged 15, I'd been riding for just shy of 18 months when the news came in about my RS shutting. To me this was the end of the world, I wanted to stay there, so bought a horse I could 'grow into'. Unfortunately it all went pear shaped from then with him and my following horse, however just over 2yrs after buying my first, 4yrs into riding, I bought my current horse. She's my best friend and my rock. She's not been easy and I've certainly grown into her, but I wasn't truly overhorsed beforehand. Yes she intimidated me to a point, and yes I fell off a lot, but we built up a bond and were unbreakable now.

So, I echo the comment of finding the right horse. It's not easy. As you get more experienced, buying horses becomes easier as you can ride and handle more horses so it gives you a greater idea on suitability. But buying your first horse, you need a real life support network there to help you should things start going pear shaped, it can either make, or break your relationship with your horse.

Good luck!