If you read this extract from an article of a psychology book about having different mindsets, do you think there's a connection to riders (being the parent/manager) and horses (being the employee/child)?
Many parents think that when they judge & punish, they ARE teaching, as in "I'll teach you a lesson you'll never forget." What are they teaching? they are teaching their childrenthat if they go against the parents' rules or values, they'll be judged & punished. they're not teaching their children how to think through the issues & come to ethical, mature decisions on their own (this can be translated to relevant horse-speak like how to behave in a calm manner, think for himself, trust the rider's direction etc).And chances are, they're not teaching their children/horse that the channels of communication are open.
It's not that "growth-minded" parents indulge & mollycoddle their children not at all. They set high standards, but they teach the children how to reach them. They say no, but it's a fair, thoughtful & respectful no. Next time you're in a position to discipline, ask yourself, What is the message I'm really sending here: I will judge & punish you? Or I will help you think & learn?
what do you guys think?
x
Many parents think that when they judge & punish, they ARE teaching, as in "I'll teach you a lesson you'll never forget." What are they teaching? they are teaching their childrenthat if they go against the parents' rules or values, they'll be judged & punished. they're not teaching their children how to think through the issues & come to ethical, mature decisions on their own (this can be translated to relevant horse-speak like how to behave in a calm manner, think for himself, trust the rider's direction etc).And chances are, they're not teaching their children/horse that the channels of communication are open.
It's not that "growth-minded" parents indulge & mollycoddle their children not at all. They set high standards, but they teach the children how to reach them. They say no, but it's a fair, thoughtful & respectful no. Next time you're in a position to discipline, ask yourself, What is the message I'm really sending here: I will judge & punish you? Or I will help you think & learn?
what do you guys think?
x