Nervous Nellie Thread

nat17

nat17

Minnie, Sam and Dolly
May 30, 2002
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We used to have an ongoing nervous nellie thread here ages ago....

Just wondered if we can get one going again as support for each other, telling everyone of there acheivements as they happen, no matter how small...

I am a nervous nellie, but I have a great new pony Sam who is helping me with that, I have been taking him out on short road hacks to get some confidence and trust before the big open fields and stubble hacks...

They are fast approaching... I have have a few biting issues at the moment so trying out new ones all the time... but any day now, its going to stop raining and we are off over our stubble fields.... :eek: My knees are shaking already....

So come on any more nervous nellies what have you acheived this summer or have you got worse?

I know I need the support but also the push from others to get on with it!:rolleyes::o
 
Hi Ya

Well done on your achievments so far, have fun on the stubble fields and let us know how if felt.

Im ok on open fields, more worried about bridle ways as Grace spooks at anything that may or may not be hiding in the trees.

Im/was a nervous nelly in certain situations, but this summer I have achieved so much, I will now go out hacking with anyone and done loads of sponsered rides and I have started to jump (only small ones mind you)

What I am trying to overcome now is me and Grace going solo.

So off we set last night in the wind with me gassing away to her.

Last night we achieved our longest distance, was only out for about 20/30mins and I made us go up the scary lane with the hidden dragons:eek: she run backwards, backed her self into a fence at least 4 times, but I stayed nice and relaxed and asked her to go forwards and we made it to the end and then walked home I was so proud of her and me, had huge :D:D:D
 
:)I think i must be one of the biggest Nervous Nellies on here and iam not afraid to admit it:D.I took Jack on loan last October,i have bought him now.He is only 5 but he is so safe 100% on the road,but i have only ridden him a few times which is really stupid and the waste of a good pony.I have had,had a lot of stress within my Family though this year with one thing and another,plus iam going through the menopause and i really dont feel myself at the moment,i just dont want to ride,i carnt be bothered,but the trouble is the longer i leave it the worse i get the thought of ever trying to canter terrifies me,i dont think i will ever pluck up the courage tbh and the older i get the harder it will be,iam 50 in November so the clock is ticking:D.Iam starting to think if iam not going to ride,i should think about giving up,because iam never going to gain my confidence otherwise.Iam fine with handling and ground work,walking horses out inhand in traffic etc,its just the riding side of things.I have done a really stupid thing in buying Teagan she is only 2,but she was in need of a home so heart ruled head:D,but i did buy her knowing i shall probably be to frightened to ride her myself and i will find her a nice home later on,but at least i can get her used to being handled,traffic etc.It is horrible wanting to be able to ride,go on pleasure rides with my Friends,but not able to because of having no confidence.I know not feeling myself isn't helping things at the moment,but i dont want to look back on my life later on and think i wish hadnt being a Nervous Nellie.Thanks for starting this thread nat17,because i feel sorry for anybody who is in the same position as me and it is great to be able to share our fears.Sorry my reply is so long,a big slice of cake for reading.:)
 
I'm definitely a nervous nellie and having had Tia for less than a month, clearly I have my very shaky moments. Haven't hacked out on her yet, for various reasons, not just nerves, she's been lame, moved fields etc etc, but have ridden her in the school and she behaves well. But its building up to the hack across the farm scenario, and I'm with nat17 on this, I get butterflies at the thought! I just want to know that she won't run away with me and I'll be ok. MY RI has ridden her on a small ride, I've been behind on a RS pony, and she was fine, but thats my very experienced RI doing it and not me!

GinaGeorge, thanks for sharing your story. I'm sorry to hear about all of it, but don't beat yourself up about not being able to ride for whatever reason. Maybe you just need to take things very slowly and have a few lessons on your pony?? (Sorry, you may have done this already) And on hacking, maybe take an RI with you? And if it takes you two - five years or longer to canter, then who cares! And if you don't ever canter, well that's fine too. :) Good luck everyone!
 
essexlady said:
Last night we achieved our longest distance, was only out for about 20/30mins and I made us go up the scary lane with the hidden dragons:eek: she run backwards, backed her self into a fence at least 4 times, but I stayed nice and relaxed and asked her to go forwards and we made it to the end and then walked home I was so proud of her and me, had huge :D:D:D
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Really well done for that, it can be so hard to hold your nerve and stay on, you must have been grinning when you got back:D


Ginageorge, I feel for you as I i Know what its like, you think you are the most nervous one on NR? I bet your not! I know you say you are not feeling yourself at the moment, but hey you have to start somewhere? Maybe you need to openly on here..in writing ( lol)...give your self a goal, maybe it will just be tacking up, getting on, and getting off again?
That would still be an acheivement feeling the way you do, I know for me I tack up, get on and go down my drive, about 1 mile, turn round and come back, get off and smile:) or even :D Then I may do the same thing every day , until I then go down the track or across the road.

I know I want to get over my fears, there is a whole loada fun out there waiting for me to join in, just like those sponsored rides you want to go on with your friends.

Maybe we could all set daily or weekly goals, and report back...and that includes you Nicnac? We are both in the 'new horse' trusting stage....
 
so many of us really isnt there????:D Think maybe I must be the most nervous nelly - had JJ 6 weeks now and only just riding him again and that is only little bit of trotting in paddock and very short amble up the lane!!! (Im SO brave arent I?):o

Must add though that these brave steps have only been taken whilst under the influence of overdose of Rescue remedy, hands and face drenced in Pax - and JJ loaded up on RelaxME!!!!

Full of optimism after very relaxed riding on Monday - now have chest lurgey so cant ride/go out for a couple of days - and the sad thing is - not sure if Im relieved at a genuine excuse not to ride or disappointed:confused: How sad am I?????

Gina George - what does it matter - get pleasure from being around your horse anyway and when things feel a little more settled in other areas Im sure you will one day just get 'the urge' to have a go at riding again? I know when I decided to swallow my pride and ask YO for help everything started to look a lot less scary - do you have anyone who could be your sort of mentor on this - must be someone you trust that will be understanding though and not push you too hard IMO?

Oh well - back to the cough mixture and surely that slight butterfly in the tummy area wasnt the thought of getting on him again when Im better is it???:D:D
 
This thread was made for me!!

I am the same with the little pony (14h) I bought 2.5 weeks ago now. I first rode her on a hack out (my 2nd of all time), which I did to get my confidence after riding the 16.2h horse I bought with my OH. I had issues with the size of her, and cantering! oh I used to break out in cold sweats just trying to canter on her in the RS it used to go all wrong! My little pony I thought was very well behaved (and she probably is) but as I came off her, or rather bailed when she cantered off on a hack 2 weeks ago and I couldnt stop her, but since then I havent had the bottle to go out on her again! My OH said he would walk with lead rope at the side of me, but I got all tearful and chickened out last Sunday. A good friend rode her out to prove she was okay while I walked beside her and another I met at the RS who is mostly the same as me, told me to stop trying to rush things and beating myself up for not having the conficende to do this yet, but its so frustrating that others can do this with little problem! I have a lesson tonight, which I love doing (although we are jumping, little, tiny jumps, more like steps) but nerve wracking all the same. I just feel like if I dont ride her out, she will become all spooky when I do eventually do it as she wont have had the practice herself. She is 8yrs old, mostly a sweetie, but does have a mind of her own!

Sorry for the going on- but I feel such a failure:o
 
Can I join too please? Bought my first horse 4 months ago (as a novice, mature rider). He's a great boy and just the job. However, I still get butterflies before a hack and have not jumped him yet (will start little tiny cross poles soon). The furthest I have hacked alone is 2/3 mile to the farm where I have a fornightly lesson, however, I do feel quite nervous on the way!

On the other hand I am becoming far more relaxed when out hacking with others and do this frequently - quite enjoy a good gossip/chat. I have now cantered on a bridle path, in the lead:eek: I'm doing a walk/trot dressage competition at the w/end.

I always feel anxious if he behaves in anyway other than 'normal'. And his minor spooks (they are quite small) do tend to make by heart pound for a minute or two (but I think the first minor spook terrified me for several hrs):eek:

However, it is all progressing in the right direction and I'm luck to have found him;). So onwards and upwards, but I do feel I am still very much on the steep edge of a very steep learning curve!

Good luck to all nervous nellies!
 
am i allowed to join this thread too? i don't have my own horse, i ride regularly at my RS but i've got a huge fear of downhills! I hate it when my horse slips or trips and i'm out on the road...get me in an open field and i'm fine..what's all that about? Downhill on tarmac just gives me palpitations! It's so daft, i've never fallen off when my horse has slipped or going downhill, i'm just peculiar!
 
Anyone can join ladies:D

Complete novice you are not a failure, just aware you dont bounce anymore and have natural fears. You need to join us and make some goals, its great that your OH will walk with you on the lead rein, its just what you need, how about making that your first goal?


Cortrasna, relieved or an excuse, which ever... you will be well again soon and will have to add your first goal... maybe it will be to go cold turkey on the resucue remedy or you wont be able to ride as you will be in the Priory!

Poppy1, sounds like you are on the way up, well done, your really breaking the back of the nervous nellie badge:D

And Abserd, your not odd... just aware what could happen! We have to get you to move somewhere flat and you wont need the nervous nellie club anymore:D
 
nat17 said:
Anyone can join ladies:D

Complete novice you are not a failure, just aware you dont bounce anymore and have natural fears. You need to join us and make some goals, its great that your OH will walk with you on the lead rein, its just what you need, how about making that your first goal?


Cortrasna, relieved or an excuse, which ever... you will be well again soon and will have to add your first goal... maybe it will be to go cold turkey on the resucue remedy or you wont be able to ride as you will be in the Priory!

Poppy1, sounds like you are on the way up, well done, your really breaking the back of the nervous nellie badge:D

And Abserd, your not odd... just aware what could happen! We have to get you to move somewhere flat and you wont need the nervous nellie club anymore:D
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LOL! thanks Nat...who'd have thought Leeds was so hilly :D
 
This was made for me..I am only nervous with my pony though,i am fine with other peoples...i have taken loads of advice and have stopped thinking i have to ride everyday...this has taken a bit of pressure off.I am just taking it 1 day at a time.hopefully i will soon be posting about great hacks i have been on.I got talking to a girl yesterday who has her horse near mine and she was telling me about some great hacks..including some great gallops .She must have wondered why i was looking at her as if she was mad
 
I want to join!! :D
I have had my part loan for 3 months now and have just started jumping with him, he loves it but gets very excited and starts rushing after them sometimes so that is one thing that makes me a bit nervous, have not cantered out on a hack yet as his owner told me he gets a bit excited and bucks sometimes when you ask him, if she hadn't told me i would have just done it i think....i find thinking of things that can happen makes me more nervous i have cantered in a field and he was ok. Also on the ground i have more confidence with him now but i still cannot stand behind a horse for ANY reason, i don't know what made me like it as i have never been kicked but i always walk a big distance around them or in stable i go round the front rather than behind, his owner just stands there right behind him and nothing ever happens so why can't i?:o Yesterday when i went to bring him in he wouldn't move so now feel like i have failed as i couldn't make him come in I worry that his owner might want to get rid of me sometimes :o
 
I need to join this too! I am in full 'nervous nelly' mood at the moment as me and Muffin have our first hack out with another horse on Friday ......eeek. This week we have started to go 5 mins down the lane from the yard on our own and I have been so scared and had to deal with countless spins and attempts to return to the safety of the yard. Muffin gets very nervous on his own, particularly as we have to pass the horse eating cows, this is not helped by me passing on my lack of confidence. However, I am told he is too strong when out with other horses - so something else to be worried about, have butterflies, feel sick about etc etc
We have been going great in the school and we have also been into a field on our own and done some walking and trotting round with no problems. Now we have to actually leave the yard if I am to achieve my dream of being a happy hacker. We are just taking baby steps towards this goal but we will get there eventually.
So good to know I am not alone with all this - and I wish everyone on this thread best of luck with their riding :D
 
I'm most definately a nervous nelly :o its sooo annoying cos I didnt used to be. I've had Frankie 2 months now,havent hacked out yet although I'd love too,but really I want to go on my own with him and I'm not sure how sensible that would be just yet. I rode him for the first time on my own (without my instructor) which was lovely although I fell off lol (rode bareback hehe) , I think most of my nerves are related to other people seeing me ride and judging me. I'm also really bad for holding my breath when I'm nervous and then get Frankie nervous.
 
I am in the NN club, at the moment I am a bag of nerves as have just entered jumping competition on Monday and fell off (twice) last time I jumped a couple of weeks ago and haven't jumped since - what am I doing??? Just trying to psych myself into getting over it!
But what I would like to add is that if I look at myself a year ago when I got him I was scared of even riding him alone in the field, let alone cantering....and if he spooked I deeply panicked....and as for hacking alone, I couldn't even dream about it.....so just have to keep plodding away i guess!
 
nat17 said:
I know I want to get over my fears, there is a whole loada fun out there waiting for me to join in, just like those sponsored rides you want to go on with your friends.

Maybe we could all set daily or weekly goals, and report back...and that includes you Nicnac? We are both in the 'new horse' trusting stage....
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Good idea Nat17! My goal this week is to get Tia out on a small hack (with my RI in front lol), weather and lameness permitting....eeek, scared at the thought!

Good luck to everyone else too!! Its great to hear about everyone has come on. I've managed to catch Tia in scary field with bullying mare and two others - wouldnt have gone near it a few months ago, a small thing I know, so even if I don't do the hack at least I've done that! Not that I'm chickening out of the hack though! x
 
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Nicnac said:
Good idea Nat17! My goal this week is to get Tia out on a small hack (with my RI in front lol), weather and lameness permitting....eeek, scared at the thought!
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Mine is to change his bit today, and go out down the drive and down the wooded path, if I feel brave I will come back across the stubble... :eek::eek::eek: scared....:eek: But I have to hack alone.. or i may ask the dogs to come...:rolleyes:
 
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